J[Alt]K's Turret Platform

So yeah, I started another one.

2009-01-05T17:28:00.002+08:00

http://scribblelog.blogspot.com/

Yeah yeah, I can't even update this dirt stall consistently, and yet I can't stop making new commitments that I can't keep.

But who cares? It's for free anyway, and if it makes me happy, it's good enough.

Well, perhaps I may deposit my thoughts over there into the Scribblelog more often than into here, but that is if I am in the mood to scribble. Just keep your eyes sharp on here and there, people.

My eyes... my poor poor eyes...

2008-12-01T12:25:00.003+08:00

And I never thought this will happen to me.

This, as in walking to the entrance to the door just to be greeted by the image of a fat lady donned only in a piece of towel looking shocked at the presence of an unsuspecting guy which is me. Stupid Chinese girlfriend of African housemate's who doesn't know what SHAME is.

I will have nightmares for this whole week. Especially when this whole week is one of the crappiest weeks for me due to it being stacked with a lot of difficulties. And especially when I don't have a bottle of bleach, nor can I unsee what has been seen.

Eww.

Madagascar 2 Sucks? What?

2008-11-26T01:12:00.005+08:00

I don't really get it.

No, more like, I don't really get why people don't really get it.

Madagascar 2 is awesome, even though I didn't get to watch the prequel. Why did they say it sucks?

The smooth plot, the jokes, the flair that makes the movie move, I enjoyed and savour down to the tiniest bits (aye, the penguins rock, good job soldiers). Is it really that hard to, well, enjoy it? If you'd ask, I actually preferred M2 over Wall-E.

Prior to the day I went to watch it, 2nd bro Cless called me to ask me out for a drink during the weekend. Well of course I had to turn it down, so I told him that I'm going to watch a movie. When he found out that I was watching M2, he commented that 'it wasn't that good'. Well, no offense 2nd bro if you're reading this, but I really felt a bit 'huhhhhh' when you reviewed it in such a not-so-convincing way. :|

Well, not only reviews from friends were like that (received some of that even after the show), the reception of the audience sitting around me and gang while in the cinema were what I describe as 'awkward'. We seem to be the only ones laughing at most of the jokes, which I think the only reason was because the audience couldn't understand what they signify. I think my laughter could be heard all over the silent box when King Julien made that infamous personafication in French (not a spoiler :D), and them people would be thinking what's this arsehole sitting in the front hole laughing at?

Maybe I'm a bit of an elitist if I put it in this way, but the majority of the local community has been suppressed from knowledge of how the world runs. Yeah, perhaps the Internet has changed the way we lived our lives, but at where I'm staying, there are still people who still does not know how to use Google. That's probably why international-level jokes ain't much of a popular thing here. Thank you, MoE, for making our kids all into Solid Frogs sneaking around in coconut shells.

Seriously people, M2's jokes ain't that hard to understand if you've done your homework (like finding out who's the late George Peppard, which is regrettably one of the jokes that I failed to comprehend until I went back to my PC and Googled), and the whole show ain't really that hard to be enjoyed. So people, do me a good favour and go watch it another time (had plans for that) before you start telling people that it sucks.

I Was Twenty-Three

2008-09-24T13:16:00.013+08:00

I was twenty-three when it all happened
the day Justice died and gone broken
faces on the streets and autumn gardens
none of which shown they weren't saddened

Alas, we were all tricked and betrayed
with our sense of direction was led astray
while the ones guilty laughed and play
and us the dying lot here could only pray

We have no option but to be brave
to defend the roads that we have paved
to fight and bring back what we could save
till the very end of our awaiting graves

Hear my plead, for the very least
for we must join our strengths and resist
together we must stop and slay the beast
that feeds off us greedily as it's feast

I was twenty-three when it all happened
the day Justice died and lay broken
but now, in the streets and autumn gardens
faces were no longer saddened, but hardened

For those who had sinned will surely pay
for their crimes that they've gotten away
while we will just laugh and say
They had finally met Judgment Day

We shall be rid of thieves and knaves
and seal them within the lion's cave
our children honouring the day we had saved
and flowers will lay on our heroes' graves

Hear me pray, for the very least
our future lays and live within our fists
For the day when the abusive cease
will be the day of long-lasting bliss

The Thin Fine Line of Racism

2008-09-18T16:10:00.003+08:00

Define being a racist. Or rather, define NOT being a racist.

Yeah, that's the challenge I set for all of you who are reading it here. This is something that we cannot run away from, as unless you're a hermit or a hikikomori who refuses to step out from your safety circle to keep in touch in this world, you will always meet someone that does not belong to your race.

I live in a country called Malaysia, a place where multiple races (still attempting to) blend together and hang out with each other in order to achieve a display of feats that people of different racial backgrounds can mix with each other. Personally I don't think all of us are that open-minded, as I can sometimes hear from some of my fellow Chinese mates tagging the other races with not-so-pleasant names - though fortunately those narrow-minded people are just minorities. But I don't really care anyway, because what matters to me is what kind of a person you are, and not what colour your skin is.

There are people of different races whom I respected as well - The Buddha, Richard Feynmann, Charles Dickens, Morgan Freeman, King Abdullah II of Jordan, RPK etc. These individuals are people who possessed strong principles in their life, and taught me a lot of what it means to be a human in this life.

Personally, I disliked playing with the racism game, but there are times where I can't run away from being called a 'racist' person because of decisions that I have to make. Sharing an apartment on the same floor with 2 other African students has gave me some experience in that matter, as well as an issue that occured sometime ago when I had an ex-housemate (who also happened to be African) openly asking me 'Are you racist?' when I had to temporarily confiscate his properties because he couldn't clear off his rental debts to me. I had my duty to fulfill, and because of that I was tagged a 'racist'.

Let me get something straight about me - I'm not being mean to others because they are of a different race, but only because they are being complete jerks to me. And only jerks would go as low as to play with the racial card - calling others a 'racist' when they had been cornered by enforcement due to their own irresponsibilities and lack of morality.

Well, call me whatever you want, 'racist' or 'Nazi' or 'KKK', it doesn't escape the fact that those namecallers are a bunch of wussies who can't even defend their own rights. The racial card is only dealt when you demand for sympathy, but I don't sympathize jerks who were just asking for trouble.

In the same time, I'd like to convey my message to some of you political individuals in my country who had been playing with the racial card - how different are you from those jerks that I've encountered when you provoked our people with the racial issue? Unlike the others, personally I don't demand you to apologize, because I understand that jerks like you are immoral beings and immoral beings don't know what an 'apology' is. That's how hopeless you are.

心有鬼

2008-09-17T14:34:00.002+08:00

你骗人你撒谎你到处伤天害理
你有罪说没罪脸皮厚得像铜壁
可是你的心司马昭都不够你
连盲人都看到你心中那只鬼

遮来遮去你怎样遮一点都不够
盖这盖那都永远盖不完这丑陋
耍的把戏只是个骗小孩的魔咒
也骗不过你眼前这群食鬼野兽

~死未~

你的心有贼有洗不净的霉味
你的眼贱卑有看不清的墨黑
再改再来过也不能清除你的罪
除非替你啃噬了你心里那只鬼

A Swirl of Dust (and maybe some ranting)

2008-09-08T17:09:00.000+08:00

It's been a while. Been quite a while. I'm a lazy person when it comes to blogging. I don't have much to write other than, perhaps ranting on other's faults. Maybe because I don't love things enough, maybe I'm just a hypocrite writer, or maybe I'm just a hollow person deep inside me that I'm boring like a chalkless blackboard. Yeah maybe, possibilities up to infinity.

Well, my recent health downfall has brought me down to new lows - to a point where I felt I was breaking down physically and mentally. Had think of certain things around while I was stuck on the bed, things like the future (a bunch of noise), some weird and odd ideas out of 'creativity' (another bunch of noise but are regulars), and some memories (a bunch of forgotten noise that popped out of nowhere). I had been thinking of getting anew on this current lifestyle of mine and move on to a better one, and that includes (out of among the many things in my real life and what's not) the direction of this blog (thinking of maybe fixing my blog's URL and contents etc.) and what I want to do about this piece of crappy life I'm leading.

Well, this place is stagnant, so I guess it's time to make it flow a bit more. I had been much more deviant in the past (maybe I was naive and tried to be 'outspoken' at that time), but now I'm more silent nowadays because sometimes it's best (methinks) not to talk at all.

---

Oh yeah, the rant time.

Yeah, it's about you guys who DON'T know what a CINEMA is for.

A CINEMA is NOT a place for you to chat to your date/friends (and that includes explanation about the movie to that dumb date of yours). A CINEMA is NOT a place for you to chat to your phone either (and that includes when your mother calls). A CINEMA is NOT a place to show off your stupid ringtones repeatedly.

A CINEMA is a place for everyone who paid to watch a movie of their choice, in a wider screen and booming speaker systems, without much disturbance coming from everyone's cooperation so that everyone can have an enjoyable viewing experience. Anyone who's not going to a cinema for that sole reason SHOULD BE KICKED OUT, PREFERABLY BY A CERTAIN SPARTAN KING.

(Which also reminds me of that jerk who sat in front of me during 300 - guy was making stupid annoying sounds off the straw that he put in his mouth, and I have to tell him to knock it off.)

When will my fellow Malaysians ever learn to respect what a cinema is? That funny Digi ad with the 'ah beng' getting bashed after speaking so casually in the cinema, how many actually took it in heart as a lesson? Sadly and ultimately ironic, there are people who ignored the message within.

I'm going to report the next person who offends me in the cinema to the authorities that he or she is SUSPECTED OF FILMING THE SHOW ILLEGALLY. And I WILL DO IT THE NEXT TIME I GO THERE IF SOMEONE DISTURBS ME WITH STUPID WAYS IN THE CINEMA.

So to you who see this and will appear at whichever cinema I will be attending, please do this before entering the cinema :-

- Throw away your stupid phone, which you don't know how to put it to silent or off mode, into the dustbin.

- Throw away your dumb date or friends, who does not know how to watch the movie by him/herself and understand it by his/her own, into the dustbin.

- Throw away your tongue after cutting it, if you don't know how to shut your traps in the cinema, into the dustbin.

Else you better pray you do not bump into me when you commit your stupid deeds in the cinema.

So What Will You Lose ?

2008-02-12T00:27:00.001+08:00

... if you stand aside and make way for those passengers in the sardine-packed elevators/passenger cars to make their exit first before you make your elegant entry onboard ?

... if you stop yourself from the habit of pressing the 'Close Door' button in the lift immediately after you entered the lift and after (or for sometimes even worse, before) you pressed the button for your floor ?

... if you stop your car in front of that zebra/tiger crossing for a while to let that kid cross the road ?

... if you slow down your car a little and let that car in front of you (whose driver was polite enough to put up a signal light) to enter the lane you're on ?

... if you refrain from pressing that proud car honk of yours to the car in front of you the second the green light blinks ?

... if you spend some time finding the actual end of the queue in front of that counter ?

... if you not hog the right lane of the expressway with 77 KM/H ? (The speed limit's 90 unless told, BTW.)

... if you put up your signal 10 seconds before you make your turn on that junction (instead of putting it up WHEN you turn) ?

Well, there's nothing for you to lose if you can be considerate and patient on the road.

In fact, you'd gain something. A pleasant experience. A smile. A way to improve yourself socially. And to the unseen eye, a good karmic seed for yourself for being a good driver/pedestrian.

English

2008-02-11T02:26:00.000+08:00

Language of international-level usage which many still find it difficult to resort to.

It's the emergency jackhammer you find under your seat whenever you find yourself in a tight spot surrounded by 'alien-language-gibberish' foreigners that you don't know the origin of. And if all fails, maybe that officer behind the desk in some rural country you're having your sweet vacation would understand a couple of lines and offer the help you need in the midst of the bunch of people with their mouths jibbering *&^%$#@!.

Sad to say, I find some who shared the same heritage as I do had a bad time in it, to the point of unable to grasp the basics in a proper fashiion. OK, maybe exclude the Western-educated category, the so-called 'Banana' nicknamed by most of us who know our mother-tongue. External factors out of their own control led to this, so you can't blame them for being like, uhhh, less-fortunate. Poor choice in vocabulary, I know.

But unfortunately, there's quite a large number within the rest of the mother-tongue speaking + writing group that didn't fare well enough with this 'alien-tongue' that's composed of 26 simple alphabets (A for apple B for ball...) and perhaps quite a maze of a grammatical system (I am You are S/He is They are). In favor of the 'mother-tongue' they didn't invest enough skill points into English.

And it's even sad when they put up the excuse of doing poorly in English by putting up the 'mother-tongue pride'. Something like "For Mother Tongue ! Die you Englischists !". Further saddening would be that some of them eventually went to the lines of requesting for something that has to be exposed to them to be 'localised' to their flavor - mother-tongue flavored that is. They rather resort to a 'personal ghetto' to confine themselves away from their self-creating 'horrors of English'.

And perhaps something of the lines below sounds familiar ?

"i dun noe inglish n techer onli noe how 2 spk inglish so y dun giv mi chinese techer 2 tech me"

Don't look at me for that piece of crappish sentence-wannabe, I sucked at composing such poor-tasting comedy on my own. That's just part of my amateurish mimic skills of an attempt to reproduce one of the lines I found in a certain forums under the 'Education' category.

(And it further depresses me that the so-called 'elite students' who had straight A records will say something similiar to that line above too. Depressing future indeed.)

I've looked into the recent MUET results (which I have yet to take). I've looked into that piece of a document my mother forwarded me that was supposedly a formal letter addressing to issues of payment methods filled with backfired attempts to make the letter's author look 'professional'. I've recalled every nook and cranny of my memory fragments trying to recall the very bad moments of 'Engrish' that I've encountered in every piece of my life's experience.

And all those, are evidence. Evidence that, to me, proves how 'sick' my fellows who shared the same ethnic as me are when it comes to deal with this problem of theirs called 'Engrish'. I don't know what the cure is, but I know it's got nothing to do with enhancing the linguistic capabilities of my fellows, but more like to break the SOLID BARRIER of STUBBORNNESS and sit down properly and cope with their English.

I beg thee, people, to save yourself - English is not that tough as you think. In fact I'd rather find it much more reasonable and possible to flunk Maths than English.

A Very Commoner's Bash For "The Golden Compass"

2007-12-11T03:29:00.000+08:00

Has been days (or weeks) since the last blog kicked the dust in this blog. Motivation is back again - after I hauled my bottoms to the cinema seat last Saturday to catch "The Golden Compass". Practically to say that the driving force behind my words is my disappointment towards the film was kinda an understatement - and it's the same sort of disappointment when you were told you were served cake, you're expecting a Black Forest but in the end what you get is a nifty piece of Pandan layer cake.

So yeah, taking out the details and putting it up in a rough manner, it tells about this girl in an alternate dimension who was destined to be able to decipher this 'know-it-all' compass, and what makes her so special is because she owns the last unit in the hood. Practically there's this governing force which seeks to destroy all of the compasses because they were afraid of the device 'telling the truth', and soon the girl has to run from them and puts up the fight etc. I won't go into the story much since it's based from the novel, and also I'm just here to bash up why I'm so... pissed about the film. And before I start off I will have to disclaim that, I HAVE NOT READ THE NOVEL YET, SO I'M JUST BASHING WHAT I FELT BAD ABOUT THE FILM.

The film started out OK, but at the middle to near end part, it was obviously rushed - a lot of scenes seem to take a shortcut and skipped over, leaving me in the 'huh ?' zone. It kinda started off at the part where Lyra was convincing the bear Iorek that he was cheated of his armour. Kinda backfired on me because the timeframe between when they first met and Iorek 100% buying Lyra's 'tip' of his armour's whereabouts is just too short - something seems to be quite missing there though, like since Iorek has been tricked, shouldn't he sound a bit more skeptical and paranoid by now?

Then it got worse - the bear crashed into the local governing office to find his armour, and the enforcers were like, standing so calmly aiming with their rifles in a half-circle formation, surrounding the office while waiting the bear the come out. Waiiiiitt a minute. Something seems wrong here. They are confronting a - bear - that went berserk, not some group of bank robbers that's trying to get away with their booty and holding a hostage or two. I thought there was supposed to be more panic in the air, but somehow it was like, no one gives a crap about it.

An unintentional sexual innuendo follows next ("Do you mean, you want to ride me?"), then soon after a turn of events it was the bear fights bear scene, which was lacking in epicness for some reason (I guess I will have to blame the bears surrounding the ring for not bringing up the atmosphere enough - they are armoured bears dammit, but they cheered like wimps). But, the next part is what that really bothers me the most - Lyra trying to run across the natural rock bridge over this ravine. Iorek was like a fan for a losing basketball team yelling desperately at the TV, telling her not to look down, not to blah blah and stuff. Then when Lyra reached the middle of the bridge, the rock bridge starts to fall apart and Iorek panically yelled at Lyra to run, and then suddenly and quite surprisingly, the scene jumps to shows her ALREADY at the other end. So she can somehow magically teleport...

Then afterwards it was Hell - Cliché Hell. Think of "The cake is a lie" and then "I am your father". At that point I was already feeling quite uneasy at my seat, shifting myself in ATTEMPT to cool down my mind due to the cheesiness of the scenes (note : still the SCENES of the FILM, and not bashing the novel... yet?). And then, the escape scene was another big 'huh?' for me. How did the bear got over there in time ? I don't mean how he crossed the ravine (Scoresby the aeronaut solves the problem), but what I mean is - how the HECK did he appear that spontaneously to block the attack of the guard, without the guards detecting his presence in the first place? I guess he knows how to magically teleport as well...

The battle scene was... a mess. Practically what I see was a swarm of black figures fighting each other in the midst of chaos, and which is which or who is who is quite the great mystery there. Then of course the heroes' side won the battle and swiftly left the scene after that (but wait, there are wounded and dying comrades around the place !), and another unintentional sexual innuendo ("Come let us sleep." - sounds pretty mild, but then... it's between Lyra and her boy acquantaince, and the bear which she 'rode' before. Ewww.) before the film wraps up with a cliffhanging deus ex machina for a coming sequel.

So yeah, I walked out of the cinema, bringing with me the shock that almost caused me to have 'amnesia' to forget what I did that night. It doesn't help when all this disappointment has to be served with the fact that the cast was quite high prolifically. Ian McKellen's voice acting was great, but his role for Iorek was a brutal letdown thanks to sloppy scriptwriting. Daniel Craig was just a decoration vase - I guess he was given the unnecessarily-included and unrelated fighting scene with the Samoyeh's just to make up with his participation. The only saving grace would be, hands down, Nicole Kidman's portrayal for the personality-contradicting Mrs. Coulter. Dakota Blue Richards has the potential to play the 'mischievious, cunning girl' type, though it seems she will have to participate in a better movie to make her own portfolio look better.

So yeah, in short, the film was ruined because to me, it was rushed and the director and his team were being careless in the end. There goes my money to buy that ticket for a moment of great disappointment.

The Broken Piece

2007-11-05T23:22:00.000+08:00

November 5th 2007, 11pm.

The cat, with it's mouth full of blood, caught it's last breath. Kneeling on my knees next to it, deep in my heart a solemn prayer rang as I felt the last inch of life left the body.

For the past day it suffered on the no-man's-land on the 12th floor of the apartment my unit is, stuck in the tiny little space under the heat of the sun and the beatings of the cold rain. Should have it's calls not reach my ears, I wouldn't know it was there.

At first I tried to rescue it by tying one of my pails to a nylon string and hoped that it jumped in - but it wouldn't want to.

So I waited for a day - which is today - and went to it again. This time, hunger motivated it to catch this chance to jump.

But it had been something that couldn't avoided - that I did not expect the nylon used to carry the pail be that fragile. It must have taken it's toll, oxidising as the years kept in store flies by.

The cat was struggling it's last few breaths as I reached the ground floor. I carried it under the shades from the rain, and every weak moan it made for the pain strikes into my heart - but I knew I must at least hold it out and be beside it till the end.

It has been abandoned up there for long enough, after all. Saving a strand of time for it worths much more than it was paid for.

I tried to come up with a prayer but there was none I could remember. There was nothing I can do to it except to watch it pass away. One could say it died in my hands, but I know well that the blood did taint my hands, but it did not taint my heart - after all, I TRIED TO SAVE IT. Yet it was a string's length away, but so near yet so far. I was angry at myself for it too, but felt pointless to do so and decided to let that anger go.

Many walked by me, seeing a guy silently next to a cat, trying to figure out what's going on. But I told them to move on, as I don't want to have too many sympathetic eyes watching. Because, I am already occupied by a pair of eyes - the cat's blank stare was filled with pain and probably anguish, as if it was asking whether it itself had regret taking this choice of getting in the pail or not.

But Karma has such ways to bring people together. One of the guys came by and recognized the cat - apparently he has been feeding the cat for all these while. I took the chance to ask the guy to get me a box as the cat's final resting place. Shortly before the guy returned with a carton, the cat passed away, and I said my final prayers - for a better next life, and one day we might again, in better conditions perhaps - to it before placing the body in.

I had nowhere to place it's 'coffin', and even though the dumpster was the least favorable place that I want to put it, but I knew it has spent it's living days feeding and playing at that place. At least, let it feel it's familiar place just for once more...

As I wrote until here, I know well that all the bottled feelings throughout the whole incident had been placed in my words here. The song "Gentle Hands" has long stopped playing, and there is nothing much I can do now. Probably except to get a new pail to replace the broken one, and also to get a new objective in life to replace this broken piece of memory.

Mechas : Practical ?

2007-11-05T02:43:00.001+08:00

For months and months AND months, whenever boredom hits the switch in my mind to "garbage-recycle-process" mode, the first thing that appears in my mind would be this bugger question :-

'How practical is a mecha, in terms of actual military application ?'

When I was a kid, I really like big giant robots - they are capable of demonstrating great strength, versatility and kickarse. But the process of growing up taught me that, nay nope it's impossible to build something like that in the first place.

I have left this issue to my left and right brain for discuss everytime this question kicks in, and none could came up with a clear answer for it. Here are some of the findings that were processed :-

(1) They are expensive to produce and maintain. Hell I can buy a whole panzer division with that, along with feeding the crew for months.

(2) They are quite delicate. Looks very to me. Just take out their arms and they are practically walking tin cans with the potential to become an iron coffin. Or just take out only ONE of their legs and they are truly tin cans.

(3) They are big and tall, so everyone sees them. I mean, it's not good if EVERYONE sees them. It's as if it carries an imaginary giant "HIT ME" sign whenever it goes. Also don't fit in small spaces, and mayors hate them.

(4) They fly. Yes, given the point that it's an advantage over ground units, but throwing in the 'bonus' of it being big, tall and obvious + extremely vulnerable blind spot at the back (where most of the time the jetpack is installed, ironically), it's suddenly not so much of an long-lasting advantage anymore.

(5) Some of them can actually transform. That's going into the treasurer's tab for extra research on how to fit all the parts from humanoid form to some vehicular form. And besides, it kinda beats the purpose of making it into a humanoid form if it has a vehicular form and still can perform combat equally.

(6) They were made to look cool and flashy. By far the only fact that sounds decent to me. Well, at it's own era the Spanish Armada looks cool and flashy too.

......

But that doesn't mean I despise mechas for being scrap metal or something - there are those that I actually find practical. Take, for instance, the design of the Landmates in Appleseed, which fantastically demonstrates great manueverability, speed and endurance, and can be deployed into various kinds of battle environments. If there's anything the government should invest into, it's that.

I guess it won't be that soon before we humans can come up with an actual one that's practical - we're still in the bomb-defusing bot era anyway. Maybe the aliens out there knows how, but if they invade us with that, I think we know how to deal with them now...

得空没事做 Nothing To Do

2007-10-05T15:29:00.000+08:00

坐在电脑前，很无聊。Sitting in front of my PC, feeling bored.

考试考完了。Exams are over.

动画看完了。Anime done watching, for the time being.

音乐听厌了。My songs ain't cheering me up either.

书也读完了。Finished reading the books I have.

很想把头往键盘敲。Feeling like banging my head on the keyboard.

闷到屁这样。Feeling as bored as flatulence now.

有点活得不耐烦了。As if I'm starting to lose my patience in leading my life.

真的，这样很吸。Now this really sucks.

真的希望有点好事让我做啊。。。Really hope there's something good for me to do...

这样我就不用在这里。。。　So I don't have to be stuck at here doing...

英格里斯－特兰斯特雷德－徒－材尼斯。。。Ying Wen Fan Yi Cheng Hua Wen...

<____<

Another Comeback

2007-10-05T04:03:00.000+08:00

Been a while since I blogged (laziness to be blamed), and funny that I made ANOTHER comeback just because to spill my frustration out of some silly issues. Kinda lost track of what I left out since I placed my last post, but as usual, loads of things happened, and even more loads of things changed. But I can't bind myself to blog up all these chaos all the time, as I find wasting my life in various other ways is much more productive than this.

Well, I blog for no one save for a few of my close pals and perhaps by luck, a couple of cyber-wanderers. Who is actually that interested to waste their precious time browsing though all the ramblings of a no-life nobody anyway?

I don't know, but my family's pressure is starting to get into me lately (especially on my uh, relationship status of being single and still looking). 22 and the half, and Dad would've told me that at this age he was doing so and so, achieving so and so. I don't know, probably I'm just slow in pace, but there's no red line to mark a standard and prove that I fall below it and fail in Life. I find myself being able to manipulate words in a certain manner, And I figure out I just need some space to make it work out.

Though I do admit - at times I felt quite lonely, and I find the need for companionship. Very close companionship. Not that I'm desperate, but I just need someone to share out my feelings.

Lately family's been quite involved in various social events all thanks to Dad's involvement in my former primary school's PTA as well as being part of the committee in the Buddhist lodge my family frequented. I consider that as an expansion for my family's social circle, and that especially benefits my younger siblings. But I guess partly because of that, I'm feeling more pressured as well.

End of this post, but I felt a little more confused than I started typing. Probably I should also take a 'long walk' and shut myself off the world or something too, but on second thought, nah. Or probably better, I should just reduce my self-isolation from the rest of the world.

Yahoo Messenger 8.1 Status Problem - Cut Short to 40 !!!

2007-10-03T19:15:00.000+08:00

UPDATE : HERE'S A FIX !!! Kudos to the author !

Yahoo! decides to steal Christmas and cuts the size of the messenger's status down to a inhumane 40 characters, while keeping quiet without making announcements just to see the whole lot of us get sucked up into a turmoil.

Well, who the hell can express anything in the status for 40 characters ?! I can't even put up a proper sentence in it, which is outrageous for a Grammar Nazi like me !!!

To prove that Y! is messing with us :-

(1) Go to your Yahoo!\Messenger\Cache folder.
(2) Find for this file 'system.xml' and open it up with your Notepad

You should see the following lines :-

...max_custom_status>40...

See ?! It's been made official unofficially !!!

Someone ought to knock them some sense into explaining what is the purpose of this underhanded trick. For a big company like them to do something without explaining their actions properly is like a dog trying to pretend to be a rat stealing from the kitchen.

T-Dramas - YUCK

2007-03-12T02:34:00.000+08:00

Hear me clearly while I'm going to rant this out like a old man in angst mode.

TAIWANESE POP IDOL DRAMA SERIES SUCKS TO THE MAX.

This is not the first time that I'm saying this, and neither will it be my last. I'm spouting this all again because I simply can't stand watching my sister giggling on it for the past 2 days. I DON'T FOR THE BIG F'S SAKE UNDERSTAND WHAT'S SO FUNNY ABOUT IT.

Seriously, I don't see what's the attracting factor or hype behind these T-Dramas (as I put it for easier typing), nor do I understand why people can go crazy about them. Since well, I DESPISE them.

I'm not judging a book by it's cover. It's not even qualified to be called a book at all, and it can go and 'keep it's cover' (equivalent to Cantonese "sau pei" or Mandarinized, "sou pi" - keep skin, that is).

I tried watching one of them (all thanks to nothing-much-to-do-in-hometown during CNY), and out of the sickening boredom I ended up commentating to my relatives who were in front of the tube ala bad comedian style. Predicting the not-so-surprising plots and complaining that the characters are out of sync. In the end I eventually gave up and go play with the kids instead.

Lack of originality. Lack of common sense. Lack of a proper storyline. Lack of decent acting skills. Total FAIL being Japanese/Korean drama wannabes. And to make things worse, the spotlight is placed on those 'actors' who only have their 'looks' (what looks? Ughhh yuck) to sell to their audience. In simpler terms, they are just LOUSY and all they do is just making my skin crawl down right to my spine.

I cannot comprehend why T-Dramas exist. Maybe it's got the same reason as why porn existed - for visual desires. Like how people out there want to see skin, there are people who long for the looks of girly boys and the figure-out-of-shape girls.

Title causes goosebumps all over body. Storyline is as good as non-existant - for this you will have to watch for some time and it shall proof itself. And what character development ? More like it's the inverse of growth - retardation, I call it.

And every one of these stinky T-Dramas will have the similiar stuff in them.

Like how this character is a joke for doing some obviously stupid stuff and going emotionally down because of some crappy issues, like (most of the time) LOVE affairs. No problem becomes small problem, small problem becomes big problem, and big problem becomes a giant joke. Not as a element of humor, but as an ultimate humiliation towards the intelligence of mankind. And do take note that the fashion of those characters are most of the time, MUCH MORE HORRIBLE THAN UNDEATH. And wait till you see their fans wearing the same thing - I don't even want to recall what I see on the streets.

I mean, YES, this is a DRAMA, but there are LIMITS of being DRAMATIC. OVERDRAMATIC is just LAME, and them scriptwriters should be CASTRATED for their inability to balance out the elements and come out with a DECENT ORIGINAL storyline that actually WORKS. They really should go live a life and quit watching those Japanaese/Korean dramas and mimic what's inside.

Before I conclude my rant, I have this sudden thought in my mind - what if my future life partner is a T-Drama diehard fan ?

Oh snap.

Thoughts Flying Through The Twilight

2007-02-24T02:30:00.000+08:00

Another new year has passed. A Chinese New Year. Pochi's gone, now Porky's in the way.

I'm in front of my PC back in my hometown, listening to one of the NHK Ni Youkoso's OSTs. Slow jazz. Saxophone. And a quiet twilight alone. One of the perfect atmospheres to start writing a little in this dusty corner.

Just finished the whole series of NHK today. Could've watched it earlier when no-wing introduced it to me, but my HDD space was quite limited at the time, and I find it a little outrageous to my tastes. Plus not forgetting to mention, the 1st episode nearly gave me a headache (for real) due to the disorientating background music.

But since I've got some time out recently due to certain factors and Gendou's was offering DDLs, I decided to watch it to kill some time - and maybe a little of myself. That's what I thought.

But I managed to finished it up. Not bad at all, and at least GONZO didn't quite screw up the end this time (well they have the knack to do it all the time). Or did they? There's still a slight part where I don't quite understand throughly, but that's actually not quite important. Probably.

While watching, I came to realize that a lot of the stuff in the series is similiar to what I'm facing in my life now. A hell lot similiar than I ever thought of. But to the very least (and gratefully), I'm not a 'hikikomori'.

I guess the problem with me is that I really hated how my life is dangling in reality. Hated it so much that I cannot find a place to suit myself in. But at least for now, I've grown and is no longer that 'me' a couple of years ago anymore, where I could not decide where I want to go or what I want to be. I have to admit that I've been lucky all this while.

I thought over the words that I've listened for the past few weeks. Thinking over and over again on how things are not turning fine on my side, and how bleak the path in front of me is. I had been struggling to make the decision, on the next move that I'm supposed to make. To continue on my current course or not.

I really disliked how the things are going in my course, how the subjects are taught and stuff. To me, they are not quite bringing to what I want to be. I can say that I'm totally blaming it to the quality of education that I'm receiving.

That is why I'm learning on my own nowadays. Though slower, but I'm getting a hang of it. Ruby. GIMP. GoogleSketch. Things where I can learn my very basic set of skills. Where I can understand the fundamentals better.

It may be a little too late for me to be regretting my choice or stuff like that now, but I don't really care about it. Half of my life still lay in front of me. If I have to go through the lousy way, I will have to at least make it to the end.

I looked back at the characters in NHK Ni Youkoso. They may be at the society's lowest tiers, but at least they worked hard for their own future and fought for it. They don't want to be losers.

Neither do I.

......

......

......

Guess what.

I'm feeling lonely.

Not just tonight. From the past few months, to right now, and running into the future.

At times I have my family and friends to share out some of the moments, but the rest of the time it's up to myself. I've been like that for so long, yet I can't tell whether I'm used to it or not.

I laughed when my sis suggested that I might get better if I get myself a partner. But in truth, I don't know whether it works or not. Maybe it might. Or maybe it will just backfire and add in another load of bull into my life. Maybe being single is still fine for me now.

Drinking. I thought about it at times. Nah. I'm not into intoxification. I'm already wasted enough. Probably something else will do. Maybe music. Like, jazz. Like this song that I've repeated. Something that helps in expressing myself comfortably.

Yeah. Yeap. Just like this.

Oh well, I've already written what I want to write. Probably will come back when things gets worse. Or perhaps, better.

CURSED

2007-02-04T19:45:00.000+08:00

Couldn't bring myself to blog nowadays. Things are not going well as it seems - too many things to worry, too many things to think, and too many things to fix.

Felt like I'm hanging upside-down. Felt like whatever I'm doing doesn't make any sense at all. Felt like being sucked into a downward spiral-shaped vortex.

Been trying to free myself from those stupid thoughts. They are easy ways out, but I'm taking the hard way, not only because of my ego, but also to satisfy what others think about me. And I'm sick of these moments.

Gah. And yet I have to pretend all this crap does not affect me at all. And the more I pretend, the worse the whole situation gets. Sometimes I wished I could just crumble down and break into pieces, but I can't even do that. And that makes me even more sick of myself.

I'm going to yell this loud and clear in this dusty corner of mine :-

I DON'T WANNA FCKING LIVE IN A SOCIETY COMPOSED OF EVERY HUMAN'S DISILLUSIONS. BUT EVEN I WANNA BREAK FREE, I'M STILL BOUNDED BY THOSE FCKING DISILLUSIONS ON MY ANKLES. I NEED TO BREAK THOSE FCKING CHAINS, BECAUSE THEY BRING ME NOWHERE BUT TO DOWN TO THE DEPTHS OF THE STUPIDITY OF MANKIND.

Heck. Sometimes I need that expressing - makes a better person out of me.

I'm cursed - cursed of knowing too much. Cursed to realize the fact that the cages are there. And cursed that most of the people around me are content of living in those cages. Sometimes I wished I was dumber and more stupid, because I will not think too much and work myself out like a donkey in a mill.

I always hoped that I will find my way out of this crap. No. Better still, I will pave it out. I wanna show those people out there that, I'm not going to meet up with their expectations of me being one of the best in this society - and no way I'm going to take that title, because I'm more than that. Very much more.

OMG IT'S DA REAL THING !!!

2007-01-28T14:59:00.000+08:00

Finally !!! I got my hands on the real thing.

Aizome. Mamiko Noto. The ending theme of Jigoku Shoujo Futakomori. Waited for months until my neck has expanded in length. Ohhh it's like an angel singing in the darkness and red.

New things are coming in too. New semester, new tenants, and new crapload coming. Oh gosh it's going to be another roller coaster ride.

Oh well, back to Aizome. >:)

What The Rice Bowl Told Me

2007-01-20T00:01:00.000+08:00

I broke a rice bowl today.

Doesn't sound like a great deal, ain't it? Yet, who knows breaking a bowl has a pound worth of lessons in it? At least, I do now.

Well, I was doing the dishes when it happened. I have a bad habit of stacking up the dishes like a Royal London Circus show when I wash them, and it so happened that after all those years of happy-go-luckiness, that bad habit of mine finally claimed that innocent porcelain bowl that has been used for years.

I was like, "Oh shi-" with one big eye and the other small, while Mum - as expected - ranted beside me : "See? Told you this will happen..."

DING. My mind chimed all of a sudden. Ain't this similiar to what happens when a sudden event was triggered ? Like, a car crash, an explosion or the sorts ?

Come to think of it, we live a life inside our own bubbles. Even though the world is harsh, the society is demanding and crap happens everyday, but somehow all of us manage to shape our lives to steer clear from them - most of the time - and gradually, it becomes a routine. And when it becomes a routine, we tend to think : "Yeah, I've been doing this for all this time, and nothing bad can happen if I do it like this."

But, what if suddenly, something unexpected happens and crashes your life ? And adding to it, no one or nothing can give you a - very obvious - sign to tell you that what you're doing routinely has long-termed negative effects, or something bad could happen and your life goes crash. And even worse - we always ignore the tell-tale signals, the advice of experienced individuals, and even our own conscience just for the sake of our own life's convenience.

Just like how I broke the bowl today.

Oh well, what's happened cannot be undone. A bowl that has served my family well for ages, now lying in the trash can waiting for it's unspoken fate. My hands seek for forgiveness, and that's why tonight, I blogged.

R.I.P., porcelain rice bowl.

Broadway

2007-01-05T18:59:00.000+08:00

[ EDIT :- It's by Goo Goo Dolls. Sorry for my forgetfulness. Corrected a part of the lyrics as well. ]

Chorus :-

[-----]

Broadway is dark tonight
A little bit weaker than it used to be
Broadway is dark tonight
See the young man sitting
In the old man's bar
Waiting for his turn to die

[-----]

The cowboy kills the rock star
And Friday night's gone too far
The dim light hides the years
On all the faded girls

Forgotten but not gone
You drink it off your mind
You talk about the world
Like it's someplace that you've been

You see you'd love to run home
But you know you ain't got one
And you're livin' in a world
That you're best forgotten around here

[To Chorus]

You choke down all your anger
Forget your only son
You pray to statues when you sober up for fun
Your anger don't impress me
The world slapped in your face
It always rains like hell on the losers day parade

You see you'd love to run home
But you know you ain't got one
'Cause you're livin' in a world that you're best forgotten
And when you're thinkin' of a joke
And nobody's gonna listen
To the one small point
I know they been missin' round here

[To Chorus]

You see you'd love to run home
But you know you ain't got one
'Cause you're livin' in a world
That you're best forgotten
And if you're thinkin' of a joke
Do you think that they'll listen
To the one small point
I know they been missin' round here

[To Chorus]

-----------------------------------

Old song, but the meaning of the song is still fresh in my mind.

This world is totally screwed up, and it has never ceased to be. We were born, then we grew up, and we followed the way how our elders drown themselves in this sea of chaos.

Life sucks when things don't go our way. We already have enough tragedies in this society, and yet there are still inconsiderate people who will took pride on stepping on top of the victims.

And while writing to this point, I reflected back on myself - am I also one of those inconsiderate people? Maybe I used to, but that's because back then I was a child. But now, whenever I see something bad happened to others, deep inside me there will be a silent prayer, that the victims will get through those difficult times.

Though now, I felt like that young man who sat on the old man's bar. I don't drink, but now even drunkness couldn't drain away my dissatisfication towards my current condition now. The feeling's like getting stuck in thick mud, where struggling seemed futile. I don't want to be like the norm, nor I want to be some common folk who sits in a corner waiting for something to happen. That's what I felt deep inside me.

To be frank I've got no decent skills in doing anything. But I told myself most of the time, that doesn't mean I'm totally useless. And at times I realize I have a way when it comes to dealing with people in need. So that's why, I'll start this crusade to inspire as many people as possible, because I realize that's what I'm really good at.

So, if this is how it's supposed to be, then I'll have to make my next step. The stage's there, but I'll have to play it right.

Who's The FCKNG Genius ?

2007-01-04T18:28:00.000+08:00

Two days ago, I was going out for dinner, and when I entered the lift...

......

On the floor was a puddle of unmistakably dried brown liquid on it, and the smell came in my nose too late. And there was another puddle of it just next to the switch, which I nearly stepped on due to the blind angle...

It was obviously a stray cat's doing on the brink of diarrhea, but I'm not going to blame the cat population around the area (well with all the garbage out there it's almost impossible to get rid of all of them). Instead my concerns were on...

WHO THE FCKNG IDIOT TRAPPED THE CAT INSIDE THE LIFT ?! CAT GOT FINGER AND SO SMART CAN PRESS SWITCH AND ENTER LIFT DO THEIR BUSINESS, IS IT ?!

Dangit, this world is overpopulated with idiots.

One Year Gone, And Another Comes

2006-12-31T20:40:00.000+08:00

2006 rolling out, and here comes 2007.

Again. And like X'mas, I don't feel anything special about it. Have I grown into some insensitive prick that I've felt nothing but boredom for the recent celebrations?

New year resolutions? 1280*960. Though I'm still OK with my current video card, but I always hate it when them moviemakers make their trailers with high resolution nowadays. That and may all those stupid stuff will reduce while I welcome more nice stuff into my life.

Oh well. I'm still feeling all numb here. Maybe watching some fireworks later will do me good. Maybe.

All Thanks To The Taiwan Quake

2006-12-28T07:39:00.000+08:00

Oh yeah. Now our lines are 'pwned'. And uh, I'm blaming the quake, not the place - so it's no one's fault - except for the giant plate under the ground.

Barely managed to get into Blogger, and haven't slept yet because twilight's the only chance I get to get online. I wonder how is it going to be in this afternoon - odds are it's probably down. And hope that I'm wrong.

Oh well, crashing on my bed soon.

Sucky Day Of Laggy Connections

2006-12-27T10:50:00.000+08:00

Today's network is freaking slow. No idea why, but it's been like that since I woke up.

MSN down. Y!M has a lag of more than 15 seconds. But strangely enough, my BT is OK, as well as most of the websites that I frequent. Only a couple of sites were struggling.

Wonder who's fault it is right now. Though I suspect it might either be Streamyx or the messenger servers.

Bleh.

P/S Blogger works fine too.

Possible Solution For The Annoying MSN Messenger 7.5 error 80004005

2006-12-26T12:29:00.000+08:00

Felt the need to post this up, since when I Google'd for the solution, most of the time I was referred to the so-very-new-hot-and-popular WINDOWS LIVE MESSENGER instead of the MSN Messenger 7.5, which I'm still using the .0324 version comfortably. So sue me for being off the mainstream.

Anyway, to all the MSN 7.5 denizens out there who hit the tight spot as I did more than an hour ago before I posted this :-

(1) Recall your MSN status. Do you remember placing an emoticon in it for fun's sake?

(2) If (1) is true, open up the antique Windows Messenger (the creaky 4.7) and login into your account, and remove the emoticon from your status.

Problem solved.

Not Affected by X'mas

2006-12-24T22:40:00.000+08:00

Other than it being a holiday and an excuse to go home, nothing much for me. Nope, I'm not even expecting any presents at all.

To add in the spice, I'm actually returning to my apartment on the 25th itself. But before that, will drop by 1-U with family for some shopping - early CNY shopping.

Don't get me wrong - I'm not pulling myself away from the celebrations or getting into my emo self again. Because if I want to celebrate, I'd celebrate everyday of my days being alive. And besides, celebrating can be in many other forms and done in various ways.

Oh well, back to hunting for something fun to mess with. FInished Canis Canem Edit, and it was fun. Bravo Rockstar. :)

Passing By...

2006-12-19T11:53:00.000+08:00

Some interesting read...

WARNOCK'S DILEMMA

Back to Canis Canem Edit (Bully).

Taking A Dump Of Thoughts - Expectations

2006-12-17T10:55:00.000+08:00

Swing and swing, and in a blink, it's been 25 days since I last blogged. Time to crap some thoughts.

And being 20+, people around me start to expect me to do this, expect me to do that, expect me to do what-and-what. And I hate to meet up with those external expectations, because it's just not me. I enjoy being myself right now as a twenty-ager, and I hate to meet up with those kind of external expectations because I prefer to be honest to myself.

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List of expectations on me :-

(1) Girlfriend

Countless times have I been thrown the question that has been pelt at every male who has been assumed as an adult. To all the uncle, auntie and the small little brats who don't even know what 'love' is - can you guys just give me a break ???

This is something that I prefer to take it a little slowly and adding to it, I haven't met up with 'The One' yet, so quit bugging me by comparing me and who-and-who of the same age who's going to get married next month !

(2) Job

Another annoying question/proposal to take from the surrounding people. No, seriously I don't want that job, even if it's overseas and the pay's high. I'd rather be working as a pump attendant than to crap at a job that I don't even like from the start. Or something that doesn't stop me from going online, preferably.

(3) Personality

Regarding this, even I myself isn't quite sure about it. Probably my fault for always keeping that 'good guy' image to most of the people who are not close to me, because what I get is people treat me like a naive person who lives in Butterflyland and dance with fairies. I have to balance myself out by letting the demon inside my darkness laugh at the ignorance of those people who only saw the 'good' side of me.

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CUT. I'm not the people's kind of people, OK? I have my own set of thinking, and my own life to lead. If I were to lead someone else's life, might as well I go and change my name to that person's name to make things look neater.

For the very least, inside deep of my heart, I want to make a name out of myself, though of course a good one. So people, quit comparing me with others or I will personally change my major to Law and sue you guys for wrongly accusing me as something.

Crawling On The Floor

2006-11-23T03:25:00.000+08:00

No, rather like, 'sprawling'. And it's not on the floor - on the road.

That's what I did for today. Uh I mean, yesterday by now.

Had a friend who called for help - apparently a friend of his needed actors for a commercial shoot. Well, me and Co. had participated in one last week for a car club, but of course we were the 'keh leh feh' - carefrees whose job is to stand next to the cars going 'OHHH' and 'AHHH' on those pimped metal boxes on wheels.

But this time, the newest shoot was for an anti-smoking campaign. And probably because I sold my comical self too much to the society, I got picked as the *shameless* male lead for it.

So, the plot was about this couple walking down the road, and while crossing the road the male lead's cigarette box drops on the middle of the road, and he was hit by a car while attempting to retrieve it.

That means not only we have random retakes due to acting awkwardness, but I also have to roll on the road several times, and I had to sprawl for an estimated 40 minutes on the tarmac, smeared with fake blood (which is obviously something red, sour and tasty diluted in water) and suffering bites from bugs and ants which were attracted to the fake blood.

But the experience was fun and priceless. It's not like everyone gets the chance to sprawl on the tarmac for 40 minutes just to let people shoot you. :)

Anyways, off to deal with my stuff now, and sleep coming my way. Interesting day of events to dream of. :)

Note To Self

2006-11-07T00:45:00.000+08:00

Getting heavily drunk is not quite the my ideal way for celebrating my birthday(s).

Uh, take a look at no-wing's and, well... *shrugs*

OH YEAHHHHHHH !!!

2006-11-06T03:30:00.000+08:00

Summon Night: Swordcraft Story 2 is out !!! Finally I found the rom for it. :D

So is Jigoku Shoujo Futakomori - thanks to Ayu for the 2 episodes !!! They ROCK !!!

Now waiting for Aizome, the ED for Jigoku Shoujo Futakomori... as well as the delayed Yggdra Union...

Will You Stop Barking ?

2006-11-02T10:39:00.000+08:00

Dedicated to someone who should be sitting in his house retired and enjoying his pension instead of trying to repolish his broken old glamour of his.

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Your age is over, your time has passed
your era is already the glory of the past
yet things change and no longer it's your day
so will you stop barking, I say
will you stop barking anymore ?

Won't ask you to quit, no man's a quitter
you think you're right but that no longer matters
respected you are but count out your trash
and will you stop barking, I ask
will you stop barking anymore ?

Maybe you're old, and you're getting slow
nope won't blame or flame you for that though
but shouldn't one be wiser when he gets older
when will you stop barking, I ponder
won't you stop barking anymore ?

I guess there are things, that are meant to be
some things should be done but not all of it
and sorry no one listens to you it seems
well will you stop barking, I mean
won't you stop barking anymore ?

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Dropped By A While On The Platform

2006-11-01T01:47:00.000+08:00

Probably nothing much to write about today at this twilight hour, as I thought while I opened up this dashboard. Mouth itch settling in again - had a bite of chocolate just now. Turned on a sleepy song by Tanaka Rie, "Tadaima", while rocking the rocking chair - my PC seat broke down days ago with me on it, and all I can say is that the rusty piece of metal couldn't support what meager weight that I possess. Oh well, mmmm comfortable.

Next week is the end of this break. Lots of stuff to keep up with, and who knows what will come up when I return ? Maybe more people and stuff that I'd get to know - and who knows, maybe more e-diotness ?

But well, watching 'Gokusen' did help a little on lifting myself up - inspiration and motivation on the right spot. Probably could've been killed by over-depression if not for it. And changes are coming, I see it...

Guess after spouting all these random nonsense I'll turn up early for bed today - even though I had a nap this afternoon while it rained like '猫と犬’ ('neko to inu', cats & dogs, and probably I need to slap myself up on some decent Japanese lessons).

Life's Like A Game Of Minesweeper

2006-10-29T02:08:00.000+08:00

Well, gotta admit I was too emo on the last post - thanks to Fireburn and EwA for pointing out my 'cardio black hole'. Maybe I should lighten the mood a little in this post.

Had been slacking around again, and still not satisfied on my progress (especially on my personal projects). The newspapers for the whole week are in a heap now, yet I don't felt bothered much by the headlines - disputes between Uncle and Doctor, blah bleh blah, disputes between Uncle and Doctor again, bleh blah bleh.

Had never got a nice sleep for the past 2 days - shop lot behind undergoing renovations, and drill-drill-drill whole day long since the morning. Can't - get - sleep. Eventually I had the urge to go get some hand grenades and lobe them into that big open hole and blow out those drilling Krauts, but killing anything alive including those noise-inducing mecha Nazis on this rock in the Solar System is penalized by iron bars and free back treatment, so I'd have to pass the idea and close up the whole house like a WWII underground bunker. Hopefully they won't operate on this perfect Sunday morning, or I'll have to operate something to release gas.

Though today, went out for dinner, and, uh, I think that should be the last time I venture to that restaurant - the food is... never mind. After that, I hanged around the bridge over the LDP for a while - while munching on that KitKat Cornetto (or is it something else?) and listening to my phone's radio. Somehow it's just comfortable standing on top of the center of the highway - neverending breeze, sodium vapour lights, tremor of the vehicles rumbling below the feet, and the company of random songs from the stations. I thought of trying that again next night, but definitely I'm going to skip that restaurant.

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Well, later on I returned to my ghetto, turned on my monitor screen, and heck, still don't know how to put what I want to write into proper words. Turned on Minesweeper, started playing. Then my mind was dulled by the clicking, and the inner voice spoke :-

"Life's like a game of Minesweeper. You click your first step, not knowing the puzzle - and you will never know what the puzzle is unless you uncover the tiles one by one. Step by step uncovered, mine by mine marked, all will be uncovered by extra care, patience and rational thinking. And if you're not careful, you make a mistake - and you have to play the whole game all over again.

"But sometimes it can be a biatch - at times you find you are betting your stakes on that two tiles that you cannot judge which is the safe tile, and which is the mine. Sometimes you get lucky - but the other half of the 'sometimes' you will curse at your ill luck."

"And come to think about it - isn't Life the same ? Uncovering tiles, avoiding mines and avoiding them, got blown by that unsuspecting biatch mine you mistook for a tile, and most importantly, learning from your mistakes. And in the end, you realize, winning is not by solving the whole puzzle, but by learning how to solve it every time you face a new puzzle."

Well, that's what the voice told me, and urged me to write it down here. Maybe I'd forget about it one day, but I might find it here again and recall this little abandoned thought of mine.

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On the other hand, finished the 1st season of Nickelodean's 'Avatar : The Last Airbender' (don't be fooled by the 'Nick' tag and assume it's kiddy stuff - it's good shiat we're talking about, and IMHO it beats Naruto & Bleach in terms of creativity, storyline and animation) and as well, been watching this J-Dorama, Gokusen (dated couple of years back, so sue me for not watching it until now) that I've loaned from Sig. Both brilliant and inspiring I must say - it's like a female version of GTO, except this time you see a HELL lot of boys, a HELL lot of Yakuza stuff, and not to forget a HELL lot of Japanese humour. Don't let the female lead 'Yankumi' (nickname for Yamaguchi Kumiko, played by Nakama Yukie) deceive you by her 'normal' looks (think Asian Village/Town Girl with specs and double ponytails in tracksuit) - she can be very HOT when she gets pissed. Burning, flaming, and sometimes I'd imagine that she'd kill someone with her eyes by forcing their inner muscles to sever themselves. OHWAITDAMN - I'm mixed her up with Oboro from SHINOBI Heart Under Blade again. =
Well, probably I could again start writing because I watched like, 8 episodes for the last 2 days (average 45 minutes each minus the credits and stuff). Laughed. Pitied. Touched. All sorts of feelings overwhelming at every scene resulting in either headbanging or tearluring - probably a good kickstart to motivate my inner heart. 4 more episodes to catch, and that will be the conclusion of the 1st season for me.

And well, been spamming this song, Atsumi Saori's 'Ashita Ni Nareba', from the 'Kujibiki Unbalance (TV)' OP single 'Ai'. Had to check her name again before I remembered that she was the sweet voice that sang for 'Midori no Hibi' - well, her 'Mousukoshi... Mousukoshi' still pull the strings in my heart everytime I play it on my foobar2000. Oh well, hope the torrent for that old album of hers still work.

I guess I will have to conclude here for the time being.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Felt like a million miles away from my heart, yet a million words can't catch up with what I had left running in front of me. It may never be enough, but that doesn't mean happiness is out of grasp now.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Well, bed then, probably. Right after I Net on a while.

The Path Retaken

2006-10-25T02:57:00.000+08:00

Got up at around 10 today, thanks to my phone.

Cleared out some stuff. Took a shower, and by noon went out for lunch.

Probably because of Hari Raya, the mixed rice stall behind my house wasn't open. And well, I'm in no mood for noodles, so I have to walk another kilometer to the nearest mixed rice stall. Though in exchange, I get to catch up on what's new on the way, and there's always the radio on my 'new' phone to keep me entertained.

Over the neighbourhood. Crossed the metal bridge over the river. Passed by the LRT station. Nothing new apart from a new Guardian outlet, where a wall supposedly stood the last time I passed by there. Though people are still people, passing by with their numb passerby looks. Ignoring them, I continued on and crossed the pedestrian bridge over the LDP.

Stopped by the 7-11. Checked out what's in there, got a pack of Tic-Tacs. Walked out and continued on for another 10 minutes. Due to Raya, the streets were empty. Occasionally a car passed by, but that's all that stopped me abruptly from crossing the once-busy road. Soon I reached that restaurant, and had my lunch. Less than 20 minutes I walked out again.

Weird though. Nothing much on the way have changed. Maybe I was the only one who had changed for these couple of years. Or maybe it's the past that I did not managed to catch on ? I pondered as I walked my little journey home.

I don't know. Nothing's certain in this world. Either it's the world who abandoned me, or it's me who abandoned it. Probably I've been too disillusioned by the world's changing, that within myself I've became numb, insensitive and cold for this world. The price I pay to be an adult.

I stopped by at the 7-11 again. Bought some snacks and stuff. While walking on the way out, saw this girl waiting inside the 7-11 for her friends - another couple who arrived via LRT. I opened the door for her, and she darted out to meet up with her friends. I looked at them and pondered a while before I exit the mart.

They probably have a long way to go. And so, do I. Different routes, but nevertheless the same weight. Different paths, but nevertheless the same goal.

I continued on my way, returning to where I belong, retaking the path of growth.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Was thinking of this song while I typed on. The 1st OP for the anime series, Fate/Stay Night. Countless nights it had accompanied me, and once again tonight it had.

'disillusion' - Tainaka Sachi

Lyrics by Haga Keita
Composed by Number 201
Rearranged by Kenji Kawai

Lyrics, Translation by Byakuya.

Day Of The Instant Noodles

2006-10-23T19:44:00.000+08:00

Lesson of the day : Noodles cooked on the stove in a pot always taste better than noodles drowned in boiled water in a bowl.

Woke up close to noon today - normally would've been yelled at even if I got up at 9. Thing is, I worked myself all to 4am in the morning. And I felt all horrible all over myself, physically and mentally, so that's why today I decide not to go out for lunch. And it rained at evening and there goes my dinner plans. BLEH. Noodles will do tonight.

Tomorrow I'll go out for a change - staying at home all day does not work out at all. Get something nice to chow on, buy some snacks and stuff, and take a look around to see what's new in the neighbourhood. And that's what I've decided after I took the last bite of my noodles. Guess tonight there's no midnight oil to burn.

Wrist now turned from tingling to decay. Not like I did not treat it or something, but the plaster fell after some time. Maybe I should just leave it alone, and let it serve as a 'friendly' reminder that I should work out on balancing myself so that I won't fall terribly next time.

Browsed a couple of blogs today. Found one link, which lead to another. Something that I've always wanted to post up because to me, it's ROCK and it ROCKS.

'God Knows...' by Aya Hirano. For a better 'synch-ed' version and w/o the crowd noises, click HERE :-

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5aHrE7d2XgA

From episode 12 of "Suzumiya Haruhi no Yuuutsu" (The Melancholy of Suzumiya Haruhi, note the 3 'u' 's in 'Yuuutsu').

Reason why I think it's cool (POSSIBLE SPOILERS AHEAD BEWARNED):-

Well, Suzumiya wasn't quite the popular figure in her school, but she was just a talented person who just got bored of everything around her. Founder of the 'notorious' SOS Brigade (Sekai wo Ooini moriagerutame no Suzumiya Haruhi no dan), she was so obsessed into her own interests that she'll do everything in a 'cowgirl' manner - from wearing bunny suits and passing out flyers in the school compound after school to extorting a PC from the neighbouring Computer Society. And everything that'd made Kyon (the grumbling male lead you'd see stuck among the crowds, and his real name remains unknowned...) have a certain level of dislike for her. But he and the other 3 brigade members (Nagato, Asahina and Koizumi who were actually hanging around for a purpose) had no choice but to follow her orders - since she mustn't be BORED.

But in this scene, it changed Kyon's opinion towards her for this day. Apparently she and Nagato (girl in wizard costume from the now-defunct Literature Club who was absorbed into the SOS Brigade - and she's not any ordinary human girl, since she just learned about the guitar skills like, minutes ago ?) were substitute members for the playing band performing that afternoon. And they simply ROCKED everyone out.

And kudos for Kyoto Animation for making this great series - they did a great job on the details of the graphics and the animation. Bravo.

Oh well, guess it's time for me to stop here and start hanging out elsewhere. Till then.

Period Of Idling

2006-10-22T23:56:00.000+08:00

*coughs at the dust collected by the blog dashboard*

Oh well.

Deepavali was over. Coming up next will be the Raya festivals for the Malays.

Parents off to China for a trip, and my younger siblings went to Grannies' house approximately 20 KM away from my home.

And I, now on my second week of my semester break, will be all alone in this house. For a week. Stocked with rations and stuff to keep me alive for 7 days.

Ups will be I will have moments of silence, peace and alone to do my own stuff. At least 3 story projects, my own studies to catch up, games to play, animes to watch etc.

Downs ? Plenty as well. Already I'm sensing BOREDOM and LONELINESS. Stuff to be done daily. And I don't want to think what the other 'downs' are.

Couple of hours has passed since my parents left for the airport, and I'm already feeling the ennui spreading all over me. Heck.

I turned on the music, and my foobar2000 is repeating Maaya Sakamoto's 'Chibiko Fork'. I read a little. I wrote a little. I was less than inspired. Minimized everything.

I turned off the player and started up the GBA emulator, loading up Riviera -The Promised Land-. Less than 10 minutes later I got frustrated with the inventory system and turned it off.

I browsed around the Net again. I read a couple of blogs and commented in them, then I thought it was time to bring up this little dusty corner of mine. I wrote and wrote and wrote. Up to this point, where I'm changing the song as well. Heck, I'm not in the mood for any positive-sounding songs.

Hungry. Probably there's something for me to bite on in the stores. I decided on the song 'Cry Baby', from Kawabe Chieko - the alternate version of it (namely Shining!) appeared briefly in episode 19 of Ouran High School Host Club.

[3 minutes later...]

Seems like there's nothing much on the cupboards. Checked the fridge. Decided to open up that bar of chocolate (fruits & nuts). Contents smashed all over. Took a couple of chunks and came back to the PC.

Found a link from BBC. Apparently it was for the quiz for one of their documentary series, Japanorama. About one of their episodes, which are about Otakus.

8 questions. Answered 6 correctly. Does NOT mean I'm Otaku or whatsoever - friend showed that episode to me one night and I still remembered some stuff in it as well. Back to writing.

Wound on wrist tingling. Grazed it on badminton session this morning. Need to work out on body balance, as well as strength control. Tonnes to improve. Oh well.

[----------]

After all the doodling on this dusty corner, I felt like an empty shell.

Life sucks. Kinda.

Probably I need an impact or something. Had none since 2 semesters ago. Maybe I'll do something for a change within this week.

Hopefully it works.

WHY

2006-10-06T04:26:00.000+08:00

... are people doing stupid things, especially when they are online ?!

... do they always post without spellchecking first ?!

... some people just don't know how to learn from their mistakes?!

... people can't be more considerate to others ?!

... can't people learn how to forgive ?!

... can't they be much more creative ?!

... is the Internet connection so lousy nowadays ?!

... is it so hazy here nowadays ?!

... am I broke ?!

... am I not sleeping now but instead typing this piece of crap post ?!

... is it like, WHY ?!

Just STFU Feg

2006-09-24T21:16:00.000+08:00

Read some short article on the weekend feature on the Nanyang Siangpau today. Translation titled : "You, army ! Return to your barracks !", which was referring to the Thai coup d'etat.

I would say that, whoever paid that e-diotic biast with that pseudonym "Zhou Gong" (周公 AKA something like the Chinese version of the Sandman) who wrote that pointless meaningless article just to fill in the weekend feature ought to get his/her eyes cleaned. That author of that stupid article is just someone who lives in his/her own fantasy world to write out his/her silly little fantasy thoughts - and I doubt he/her has faced any hardship in major political changes at all. Typical writing lapdog that wastes article space in papers.

In case you're wondering what was written in the article :-

- The author was writing what the Thai army should do and should not do. He/she commented that everything should be solved with the 'Constitutional' way. Yeah right, what kind of 'Constitutional' way ? I'd like to smack the idea into his/her mind that it depends on which hands the Constitution lies in. And if voting works all the time, they would've another person for their Prime Minuster since like how many ages ago. And oh, if the 'Constitutional' way really works, there won't be such a thing as a loophole to enable the abuse of balances and checks and tax evasion.

- The author was merely FLAMING the Thai army in the papers. Oh yeah, the weekend feature of the papers, not in the forums section or something, and flaming it like a small little eleven-year old kid on some Internet gaming forums. And what little point he/she tried to convey in his/her article crumbles easily into contradiction in terms of common sense (or was there even a point in there from the start?).

- And last but not least, he/she said that politics is not the 'stage' for the Thai army. I'd say that whatever that's happening in their country is not his/her 'stage' to casually comment about. Oh bloody heck, it's not even up to him/her to comment about what's going on in their country. If he/she 's trying to tell what the Thai army should do, then I'll tell him/her what he/she should do - WRITE SOMETHING CONSTRUCTIVE (or even heck, DESTRUCTIVE) FOR OUR OWN COUNTRY IF YOU WANT TO BE THAT 'HEROIC', DAMMIT.

What a WASTE of article space - I wished it could've featured something else rather than the political 'comments' of some e-diot. Heck, I'd rather read recipes than that.

Things I Wanna See Last With My Own Eyes On Earth

2006-09-18T13:00:00.000+08:00

- Maggots in my favorite dishwashing sponge, courtesy of one of my housemates.
- Pair of flies mating that got electrocuted by me for flying in between me and my monitor (oh they were sooooo having fun)
- The idiots in some IRC channel that I frequent (refer to some earlier post of mine)
- Ming Dao, the Frog-Turn-Prince Taiwanese drama king
- Car owners who got their cars clamped for parking at my space
- The Deputy Prime Minister
- Worse Fanfic Ever
- Noob online gamers
- Forum Spammers
- Reality shows
- Cuckoos
- Campus
- My ugly writing on a piece of notice hanging in the kitchen
- My long-forgotten dusty blog
- My own self in the mirror
- More and unlisted...

:-\

Null & Void

2006-09-18T12:54:00.000+08:00

Final Tribute to the Wise One

2006-09-01T17:00:00.000+08:00

Link.

"......"

That was what my mind spoke when I received the news yesterday.

Today when I woke up, the sky was very, very clear. It had been weeks since it the weather was that clear. Yesterday the sky was gloomy, as I gazed up wondering whether it will rain or not. It didn't rain much, but last night from my balcony I can see Genting's lights shining above KL again.

A sign. Somehow it was what I felt it is. A sign of goodness on the surface of Earth, indicating his departure to a new world.

Now it is left to all us whom inherited his wisdom, to use it to polish our ways and thoughts, and in turn, pass it down to the next generation.

Farewell, "Chief". Farewell.

I - CAN'T - SLEEP - PROPERLY - AGAIN !!!

2006-08-06T06:07:00.000+08:00

I slept at 3 am today due to the uncomfortable condition I'm in - dry weather, mosquitos and stuff. And I thought getting bitten all over the legs is already bad enough.

Then, during 6 am (which is only around 10 minutes ago when I typed this blog), my NEW housemate (think Genghis Khan country) who moved in about 1.5 months ago DECIDES to make his EARLY MORNING COMEBACK with a BANG. Not only he and his friends talked in their usual loud voices, but there's a much, much more annoying part that literally put me out of my sleep - his Y! Messenger.

Apparently he has this 'very polite' habit of forwarding his 'good nite all' message EVERYTIME before he goes to sleep - AND I DON'T KNOW WHY AT ALL. And guess what ? Most of his peers REPLIED to his 'good nite all' message - AND I DON'T KNOW WHY EITHER. And he did NOT turn down his speakers NOR did he turn the stupid incoming message RING off - and the effect is CONTINUOUS BOMBARBMENTS OF INCOMING MESSAGE RINGINGS, WHICH ARE UTTERLY USELESS 'GOOD NITE' REPLIES TO HIM THAT FILL ALL OVER THE APARTMENT, which leads to me waking UP in a LOW-BLOOD-PRESSURE-MOOD and ending up in me RANTING AND EXPLODING IN MY BLOG AGAIN.

I can use the giant F- again. And there is NO way - and I mean, NO ABSOLUTE F- ING WAY - that I can COOL DOWN DUE TO THIS STUPID COMMOTION. I've to go out later before 8 am, DANGIT.

This will be something like the yellow card now - if he does anything that lacks of intelligence again, I will have to take action. And strangely enough, my connection here seems to improve right after he turned off his PC. Let's hope it's not because there's too much spyware in his PC.

Rant Of The Day

2006-08-03T00:49:00.000+08:00

August 3rd 2006, 12:50 am.

Headache's bugging me, and just took some medicine for my flu which has been running for the whole day. My fatigue is killing me - to the extend that I'm even too tired to go to sleep. I don't know, but my health seemed to be declining for this week - probably the weather change was behind this.

Connection's bad recently - the lag has been like that for almost a week. Don't know what's going on with TMNut, but it seems like my home in PJ and Cyberjaya are badly affected as well. Can't even do a proper thing with such a lousy connection.

Poor health, poor connection. I just hope nothing goes much more worse than that. No wait, there are. The FUBAR people.

-----

Throw in an e-diotic international student (think hockey country) staying downstairs who seemed to think that blasting his speakers to the max for 5-10 minutes is part of his 'legal rights' - well, I haven't shown him my 'legal rights' of treating him coffee in the police station. And when I mean blasting to the max, I mean ground-trembling moments for the upper part of this condominium I'm staying in.

And well, yesterday he did it again - it isn't the 1st time he's doing that kind of thing - apparently a week ago, his neighbour went all over the place to hand out complaint forms to the other tenants to complain about his inconsiderate acts. Being sick and having my little time of peaceful music-enjoying disturbed, I turned up on his doorsteps and then only did he turned down his speakers.

He came out, and he starts to defend his own acts - he claims that he hadn't be doing that for the past 4-5 days, and he wants to 'enjoy' his music in extremely loud volume. I cut him in, saying that he is being inconsiderate and stuff, but he kept insisting on that he "understands the situation but need a break because speakers needed to be blasted once in a while".

AND WHAT KIND OF STUPID REASON WAS THAT ?!

And because of that, I couldn't tolerate anymore - I kept cutting him in while he tried to explain himself, because I knew that this guy would be too comfortable if I don't go aggresive.

And guess what? It appears that someone noticed us - the barbarian guy's brother (the one who stayed in my place w/o permission) who was staying next door to that e-diot !!! And he came out to butt in our argument !!! *ROTFL*

But anyway, he's not much of a help - the only thing he did was standing next to both of us and repeating the line 'You got a point', and I have to do all the argument by myself. Maybe after knowing how I worked like an exploding bomb when I'm in the hostile mode, he didn't even dare to butt in and talk about what he thinks. Bleh, be it me that's the bad guy this time, but bad guy's have their times to rock other people's heads.

So, in the end, that loudspeaker prick tried to get rid of me by "promising not to blast anymore but can't promise forever because need to blast speaker once in a while". Ah well, screwed-up people with their screwed-up nonsense defensive lines. I replied to him that I "can't promise forever to tolerate as well because we can't be in a good mood forever". And well anyway, later on he headed off to the gym as he claimed and which I doubted - I can clearly see that he's just finding a way to escape from me, that's all.

-----

Ahh anyways, there's no limit when it comes to ranting about people, and some people are just plain inconsiderate fools. But as how Sig put it, "without them we have no entertainment". Heheh.

And ahh, it's already 1.45 am - almost an hour gone to blogging. Maybe I think I will just check around before I go to sleep - again.

We've Got Ourselves A Clown !!!

2006-07-30T14:54:00.000+08:00

Seriously, it's been a hell while since I blogged. Dunno why, but it occured to me that I had nothing much to blog about for the past few weeks.

Heck, the only thing worth mentioning is some slight upgrade in my PC - which actually helped me a hell lot, since we're talking a 'slight' upgrade from 256 to 768 MB of RAM. Yeah, my PC's that lousy - until now. *grins evillish*

Perhaps that's one of the few things that I had to write down here, but actually in my real life, I'm actually having fun watching silly people running their silly little shows. I don't know these people are just immature or born retarded or what (prove me wrong anyone?), but seriously, these clowns (yeah, I like to refer them as that) made me faced the dilemma of choosing between laughing my cheese off or puking my sickness off. Or both.

Take this particular clown, which me & Co. secretly nicked him as 'Big K'. Big K is an 'otaku', and when I say he's one, I mean it. Yupe, the standard typical "otaku" commonly found bathing cathode rays in front of their CRT tubes, going 'moé' over their favorites in full fetish mode. However I don't have an issue towards 'otakus' - I only have a MAJOR dislike towards Mr. Big K here. And yeah as suggested by nick, Big K is BIG in size - I doubt anything he fell on will survive the impact.

Now you'd ask why do I disliked him ? It's actually kind of none of my business, and I can easily walk away with it, but I tend to say Karma loves to hit the sweetest spots - me and him had met in several occasions, and well, he pretty much screwed himself up most of the time. Which pretty much 'entertained' me - at least I've someone as a target to snipe on.

One thing that I must admit - everytime I see him, in real life or online, it kinda turns me off. Every action, every word, everything about him, TURNS - ME - OFF. I don't know why - but some people tend to be like that. They TURN others OFF. And they ALWAYS do that. And hell, don't expect them to be the considerating type - they are very insensitive with the aftereffects of their own doings.

I know nothing about him when I first met him, but it was the second time when I started having suspicions on his personality. He inquired about someone who stalked him online - when the place he asked was merely a registration booth for the club I'm in. Me and Sig (who was also there helping at that time) looked at each other when he came up with this weird request - to us, something is so wrong about this guy. No one in the right mind will stalk this huge guy - unless the stalker's a huge-guy-fetish or, which was what we later found out to be, Big K did something to provoke the stalker.

Since then, nothing good came out from Big K. He's considered active in the IRC channel for our club, but whatever he says is PLAIN SICK. He's the only guy I knew in real life who will describe himself masturbating online. And it isn't funny at all - he's actually talking about it in front of girls.

I don't know of anything that can save him from his ignorance, stupidity or whatever you call it, but one thing is for sure - guy needs a GIANT smite on his head, preferably with something heavy and metallic.

But like it or not, me & Co. will be stuck with this screwed-up character for these couple of years. But of course, we're not going to let this clown off for anything stupid he'd cause in the future.

Hopefully when he finds this little dusty corner of mine (maybe via Google?), he's stupid enough to not know who I'm referring to. But if he does, I congratulate him - with my shoe.

One Example Of "How To Deal With Lift Smokers"

2006-07-11T01:55:00.000+08:00

Here's how it goes.

Tonight me and friend Sig (who was um, temporarily lurking in my house for the month, hogging the connection at my house for extremely heavy downloads *ROTFL*) returned from campus after dinner.

Then, when we reached our block, we followed a couple of MYY kids were walking in front of us towards the lift. One of them was holding a box of cigarettes at one of his hands - and a lit cigarette at the other.

"Oh my, those kids are going to bring that into the lift." I commented. In Mandarin, that is.

"Yeah, definitely." Sig replied hastily.

Suddenly, I got a giant lightbulb on top of my head.

"Let's take the stairs instead." I said with a smirk.

"Okay." Apparently this isn't the first time the both of us "playing" around the staircase.

Then with full speed, I climbed up the 1st floor - with Sig following close behind - and ran pass the lift doors while Vincent continued going up the stairs.

And then, I pressed the 'Up' switch.

I ran to the other staircase there (there were 2 of them) to the 2nd floor, and then from opposite, Sig ran to my direction, and I took the opposite as well.

This time, it's Sig's turn to punch the switch.

And we continued the process up to like, 4-5 floors (we couldn't remember exactly how many though *ROTFL*). After that, we made our escape (on foot) until the 9th floor, where we stopped to catch our breath (of course we had to find a corner to hide). I managed to make it back to my room before I seriously burst into laughter. And one thing is for sure - We DEFINITELY heard the "ding" of the lift stopping for every floor.

Lesson learnt - if you piss off the people in the lift, they are going to get you back on the staircase.

爱し子よ PV

2006-07-09T12:34:00.000+08:00

Enjoy. :)

EDIT: Found a new one...

People Favored Ayumi, But I Choose Rurutia

2006-07-08T10:54:00.000+08:00

After spending like around 2 weeks of downloading, that torrent containing 4 of Rurutia's albums finally reached 99.9% this morning (well, due to the last file is still 98.7, but the most important ones - all the music files were completed, thank goodness).

Rurutia caught my ears with her tender voice when no-wing passed me one of her songs, 'Traumelai' to sample - so tender that it made tend to make me had the comfortable image of falling leaves in my mind. Another friend of mine even mistook her for Ayumi Hamasaki - but Rurutia didn't have the high pitch Ayumi loves to resort to (which I sometimes find it annoying). Then after listening to 'Selenite', the song she sang for the anime 'Karas' (good stuff if you ask me - impressive graphics, dark world setting and yeah, smooth fighting scenes) and also 'Chou no Mori', I decided to search out for her previous albums via BT.

Unfortunately, most of the torrents out there had either been removed or had no more seeds, and only this current one that I'm downloading is still working. Though it took quite some time to reach 99.9, but it was definitely worth the time to get it.

Talk about more sampling - among the albums in the torrent, one of the songs which turned me on was 'Itoshigoyo' (translated as 'My Lovely Child'), which came out around last year but I only get to listen to it now. The music was hauntingly beautiful - Rurutia's soft voice works well with the dreamy electric guitar behind. And later on when I checked the translation of the lyrics, I went like 'WHOA' - read below and you will see what I mean.

Itoshigoyo (爱し子よ )

itoshigoyo itsumademo konomuneni dakarete nemurinasai
itokenai anatanokotowo mounidoto nigashitariwa shinai

kanojyono kotonara wasurete shimainasai
zaratsuita nekonadekoega sonomimiwo namenai youni
nodowo shimeagete oitakara

futari dakedeii hokaniwa daremo iranai
watashidakega anatawo mitaseruwa
anatanoa shini ginnoashiwo hamemashou
oyaji ayamachiwo okasanai youni

itoshigoyo konomuneni myaku utsu amaimitsuwo suinasai
itokenai anatakara mounidoto mewo hanashitari shinai

kanojyono kotowa mou kinishinaide iiwa
moshimo mata tsumewo tatete anatawo ubaini kitara
konotede uchi koroshite ageru

aragaukotonaku sa subetewo azukete
watashidakega anatawo ikaseruwa
anatano hanewo chigiri sutete shimaimashou
moudokokae tobitatenai youni

futari dakedeii hokaniwa daremo iranai
watashidakega anatawo mitaseruwa
anatanoa shini ginnoashiwo hamemashou
oyaji ayamachiwo okasanai youni

aragaukotonaku sa subetewo azukete
watashidakega anatawo ikaseruwa
anatano hanewo chigiri sutete shimaimashou
moudokokae tobitatenai youni ¡¡

Chinese translation

小宝贝不论什么时候都
在我的怀里睡觉吧
幼稚的你我再也不会
让你逃跑

忘掉那个女人吧
不要听她嘶哑如同猫叫的声音
她曾使你痛苦

只要我俩在一起
有我就能满足你
给你带上银制的足枷吧
好让你不再犯同样的错误

小宝贝在我的胸怀
吸取蜜汁吧
幼稚的你我的眼睛
不会再离开你

不必再想那个女人的事
如果她胆敢再来
张牙舞爪要夺你
我就要亲手杀死她

不必再反抗将一切都放下吧
有我就能带给你生命
将你的翅膀切碎丢掉吧
让你再也无法飞到任何地方

只要我俩在一起有我就能满足你
给你带上银制的足枷吧
好让你不再犯同样的错误

不必再反抗将一切都放下吧
有我就能带给你生命
将你的翅膀切碎丢掉吧
让你再也无法飞到任何地方

Me and company shared the same conclusion - the lyrics were SADISTICALLY good.

Anyway, gotta spend some time to sample out the other songs. If anyone wants to sample it well, please tell me in the comments - I might leave a link or something if there are requests for it. :P

This Is Quite A Headache

2006-07-07T02:36:00.000+08:00

No, not literally a headache, but the kind of a headache where it came from real life problems.

I was actually referring to someone I knew in real life (though I prefer not to disclose the name of said person). Someone which I had trouble trying to communicate with.

I knew the problem wasn't from my side - apparently I've received complaints about him from my other friends who knew him as well, and everyone now kind of treats him like the plague now. The moment he is spotted in the area, me and company will withdraw from our current positions within 10 seconds. To end up avoiding and ignoring him like that is seriously a really SAD thing for us to resort to - simply because me and company didn't know how to DEAL with him anymore.

I forgot how many times I ended up getting stuck in an argument with him - not like I'm that sort of a person who will go around bringing up unnecessary issues and troubles. OK I may be lying about the previous sentence, but I definitely know the difference between me and that person - I had a better understanding on who my audience is and what they want to hear from me.

And also, I definitely knew for sure that NO ONE (or rather, not many people) will want to listen to opinions or self-thought-up theories that are NOT interesting NOR based on anything that's in a sense, logical/practical/true. Simply because nobody (or most people) will be interested in that kind of stuff that doesn't make any sense at all AKA nonsense.

He's the type of person where he expects everyone to listen to him when he himself didn't really listen (or pretend) to listen to others at all - he chooses what he wants (and likes) to hear, and if something sounds ugly he resorts to being deaf.

There is nothing much that me and company can do about it - best is we pray that he turns into a new leaf soon enough, and worse is he will not interfere with our lives with his idiotic methods. And hopefully.

Hunger, Ear Torment & Bullies

2006-07-03T01:13:00.000+08:00

Hungry. Yes, I'm seriously hungry, thanks to the small little meal my family called dinner. It's nothing more than a small portion of 'beehoon' anyway.

And why did we end up with 'beehoon' for tonight ? Because there's a friggin' Karaoke function that Dad has to be in charge of tonight - and it's held in a Buddhist Lodge somewhere near home (Thus the vegetarian 'beehoon'). And don't know ask me why or how it happened, but I ended up as free labour for that event carrying the Karaoke CDs to the PA room and vice versa.

As for the participants, only one senior lady was considered good - the rest are merely ear torment. At times I have to sing along the song myself just to distract myself from the horrible wailings. And to add up the sum of these endless torture, the aunties who didn't know how 'terrific' their singing were kept coming back for more songs to perform.

Every time I see them returning to the desk, my mind snaps and starts grumbling from the inside :-

"OMGWTFPLSSTFUNDIEN00BKTHXBYE?!"

Sighhhhh.

------

Now I'm still hungry. And adding to it, exhausted as well. Maybe I will add in frustration as well, so I can fire on some stuff.

Hmm. Recalling now... ah yeah, the stuff I saw these few days.

The schoolgirl beatings.

Saw the Miri one, as well as the S'porean one. Seems like the traditional way of showing off power via violence is still popular among young people these days.

Everytime I witness a blow inflicted on the victims, I always wonder what those victims (and as well, bullies) are thinking. To me, both sides are actually acting in an identical way.

To make my opinion simpler - THEY ARE TRYING TO FIND A WAY OUT OF THIS MESS.

The victims are of course, easier to understand - they need someone to help them out of this situation. Though the bullies are slightly difficult to understand, but if one pays enough attention to them, they are actually in one way, victims too.

And the bullies enjoy what they are doing to their victim - the 2 vids that I've watched are good enough proof. It is because the bullies couldn't find a suitable way to handle their emotions, nor would they taught the ways to do so. In the end, they resort to violence to vent out their own frustration. And normally this will bring up a chain reaction of things - not only the bully doesn't benefit much from their acts, but the victims will be emotionally scarred and be affected by it for the rest of their lives, and in some worse-case scenarios, this causes the victims to become vengeful and more terrible things will happen - and this is what I concern the most.

Call it irony, but I used to be a victim of school-bullying as well. I admit I was the oddball in school, and it was quite difficult for my schoolmates to accept who I am or what I do. I was treated like an outsider, and without any liberation of any form it became sort of a downward spiral to me - I somewhat became less motivated for every year I pass through this kind of treatment.

But I deem myself fortunate, for I had the chance to pass through certain events and lessons in turning points of my life, which made me a much stronger person by now. Now there are still people who hated me for who I am, but I knew about that fact and I'm not afraid of it anymore, for there are people whom I cherish and vice versa.

And back to the bullies. Everytime I see one, I have the tendency not to hate them, but to pity them. Like it or not, they are the ones who needed the most help and guidance, and if we want to stop any bullyings from happening, we have to start from educating the bullies.

Please BANG Head Here

2006-07-01T23:59:00.000+08:00

Back in PJ now. It's so damn hot here.

Have to wake up early next morning for another badminton session again. Then when I thought of badminton, it reminds of that arse-kissing Cyber-P (short for Cyberpreneurship) lecturer - he says that we students should play more golf than badminton.

And why we should do so?

---

---

---

Because, according to his arsemouth which spouted crapwords from his poopbrain, 90% of the contracts were signed through playing golf.

Now I'm going to quote Kyon from Suzumiya Haruhi no Yuuutsu.

"That's news to me."

He has no idea whom I play badminton with. Yes, ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA.

And oh before I forgot, here's another picture dedicated to him, my Cyber-P lecturer.

Yeah yeah, and I've to face him for like, another 12 weeks. WAIT, I actually don't have to go to his class - attendance not compulsory, except he has 3 quiz papers. Screw it, I'm not going to his class this week, and I mean it - nothing can stop me, NOTHING. MWAHAHAHAHA.

Anyway, gotta hit the sack now, even though I've got my evening nap earlier on. I want to snipe more about that faggot but I will save the rest for some time later. My air conditioner, here I come !!!

Been Some Time Since I Blogged...

2006-06-26T00:04:00.000+08:00

2 weeks, to be precise. Seems like I kind of lost the feel to type, anyway.

New trimester year started last week - though it's on the same priority list as World Cup 2006, which is under the big "I DON'T CARE" category.

Though I must admit - this year the new girls are pretty though.

Nah. Can see, but cannot hold. Even I've been leading a single life for more than 20 years, but I'm not that desperate to go and try to score on every one of them.

------

Due to Streamyx's traffic shaping, I've been suffering from slow BT downloads. To heck with them - their server was lousy, yet they blame it on the P2P users. Typical Bolehland attitude.

A week ago, I was forced to switch from ABC to BitComet - it was most unfortunate that my ABC client was infected by some Trojan Horse, and 4 of the ongoing downloads have to be aborted and I have to redownload them again.

But, the change was worthy though - after I switched to BitComet, the download speeds skyrocketed, thanks to it's Protocol Encryption technology. The moment I saw 20kb/s on 2 downloads, I was so moved I almost cried on the spot. And when it took almost a week to download those 4 incomplete downloads with ABC, BitComet got them back within 2 days.

------

I don't know what to write anymore, except maybe the emptiness in my mind. I have ideas, but I don't know where to start from. I need a kickstart - and I need it badly.

It's time for me to change. For the better, at least.

Dad Didn't Have Enough Of Them

2006-06-12T11:05:00.000+08:00

I just received a call.

Mum phoned me to tell me that Dad received a call. Apparently someone is interested in renting the place.

一个依懒人。

I felt the strong urge to scream on top of my lungs.

F !!!
Damn it, didn't they have enough of the 野蛮人 ?! And on top of it, getting RID of him was already more than enough nuiscance work. GAHHHH, I should've told them about that Saturday night incident to scare them a little.

NO.
There is NO way I'm letting them into my house anymore. I'm sick of this.

Grahh, I better SMS my Mum now. Tell them about that incident. GRAAGGGHHH.

球风 - 球疯

2006-06-10T22:20:00.000+08:00

哇噻。好久没用华文写博客了。

昨天是世杯的开幕，但我可没兴趣像别人一样疯狂似地去追看人家追着一粒球满场跑 - 甘愿睡觉去啰。。。

很‘显’。今天回到Cyberia来，这里的那些餐馆都摆出他们的电视机出来让那些家里没电视机的‘小朋友们’观赏足球赛。其中一间还买了一个projector摆在星空之下让球迷看大荧幕。嘻嘻，如果下雨的话就有好戏看啰。

Anyway,‘球风’效应导致整个Cyberia好像空城般的。但这样也好，少了那些喜欢三更半夜开bass开到大大的猴子实在是心中的一把relief，多出了我最需要的那一份冷静。

---

Side note: 今天走路回家的时候看到了一个不该看到的画面。看到那个野蛮人被一个黑人吻脸颊（这是他们应该有的见面礼吗？！）。我要低头假装没看到的时候，他竟然转过头来和我招手。。。我的脸被他搞到还有哪里可以容啦?! 他可真厚脸皮死啦。

不是我看不起同性恋，但是。。。麻烦可以不要在人人都会经过的楼梯上大庭广众公开展出你的光荣行为吗?! 他是同性恋，我几个礼拜前已经心里有数了。他是回教徒，我也无话可说。可是现在竟然这样在我眼前‘搞过了’再和我招手。天收他呀。。。

Thought Of The Day : Death

2006-06-08T00:11:00.000+08:00

Was travelling with family to Sungai Buloh (somewhere at the outskirts of KL). Near the toll plaza at the end of the LDP, there was a traffic congestion at the opposite side of the road.

And the familiar black bag was laying on the center of the road.

Dad told us to turn our heads away. But from the side of my eyes, I could make out the shape of a crushed motorcycle just nearby the bag.

My thoughts were whirling within my mind as our car went past the toll plaza.

One week ago, there was another accident that occured on top of the highway flyover within the vincinity of that area.

A car slammed into the center of the flyover and erupted into flames. Four died. Among the four, two of them panicked and ran out of the car - and fell into the gap at the center of the flyover.

That flyover was more than 20 meters tall. Maybe 30.

Then again, my thoughts whirled even wilder.

Two weeks ago, the quake in Indonesia. Thousands died. Survivors, homeless and penniless, showed up on CNN with their blank expressions on their faces, hurt of their present and undetermined of their future.

They have to sleep in the graveyeards. The living among the dead.

Suddenly as I was recalling pictures from the papers and TV, Dad interrupted my thoughts with his comment.

"Most of these accidents weren't mentioned on the papers, just because they are immigrants."

Just because they are outsiders, eh?

I remembered last year's National Day. A foreign senior student staying in the block next to my Cyberia penthouse's block fell from the 5th floor. Headfirst.

Nothing about that was reported on the news, except for an obituary in the university's online bulletin.

I recalled a phrase. Quoted quite a number of times by a number of people.

"Deaths are just like statistics."

It can't be helped, I thought. Nothing can.

I closed my eyes. Mentioned a prayer.

---

When I returned home today, I converted all the thoughts into words, and placed it here in this old blog of mine.

Played this song while I was writing. Something that's relevant to what I have in mind for the day.

---

Dear God

词:陶喆,娃娃曲:陶喆

刚刚看完六点半的新闻
那悲剧又重演
有个妈妈拿着儿子的相片
期盼他会出现
看不下那画面
我转过头却开始流泪
是惩罚是考验
还要有多少的心碎
爱爱在这个世界上爱已被忘记
谁都不相信谁都不相信
相信爱哎哎
真理和公平都变成了笑话
我不愿意住在这样的城市里
话题都围绕在腥色暴力
有八卦没想法
计算逃避人人都在玩游戏
没有钱没人理你
我心里很愤怒
只能冷酷让自己麻木
拿生命做赌注
这些疯狂还要多久
爱爱在这个世界上有没有意义
没有人在乎没有人在乎
没有爱哎哎
我真的很想要开口骂脏话
不是我的错不是我的错
别怪我 dear god
为什么你闭上眼不想想办法
装做看不见装做看不见
告诉我哎哎
告诉我把爱找回来的方法
因为我无法离开这个鬼地方
(我没有办法离开 no no)这个鬼地方(这个鬼地方)
它还是我的家
刚刚看完远方传来的消息
像恶梦在继续
给点力量让自己能活下去
dear god
你在哪里
na na na....
wo wo wo...
yeah yeah yeah...

Taiwanese Dramas SUCK. Period.

2006-06-06T21:22:00.000+08:00

Whenever Pei my younger Sis turns on the TV, I felt like killing people.

It's her favorite *coughstupidcough* Taiwanese TV drama again. Damn.

I have to turn on some crazy music (most of the time, anime) to distract myself from it and calm myself down.

Right until now, I've always been an "Anti-Taiwanese TV Drama Series Protestor" (I'd shorten it as 'ATTDSP'). Long since the days of F4 roaming the airs in their Meteor Garden days, when I felt like puking over their sissy-like long hair. And one thing that I don't understand is that why there are fans worshipping them like gods during their popular days. Now their popular days are over. Nothing heard about them now, except for rumors of them once in a while. Rest in peace, Fag 4.

It's not like I don't watch TV, but it seems I had no other choice left, as the local TV channels are plagued with those Taiwanese dramas due to popular demand. Pfftbleh. Most Taiwanese dramas out there are heavily composed of Japanese cultural elements - way too much until they are nothing more than plagiarisation. Maybe that's why I prefer anime over Taiwanese dramas - at least for animes, they have a lot of room to develop a pretty good, decent story.

---

Back to reality. Now I felt like swearing, and I really mean it. Right now Mum's scolding me for turning the music too loud, when the TV speakers are booming all over the living room. Damn. How I wish my PC could be located somewhere else, like my room upstairs. Can't I get some peace of my own ?!

Grahh. I don't care now. Let them complain about the volume. I just want to distract myself from that stupid show, and that's all.

Plaguing The Turret Once Again With YouTube...

2006-05-25T12:48:00.000+08:00

Finally found this after some time of searching online... Jigoku Shoujo's ED, Karinui (Basting)...

UPDATE

Another one that I've just found... Jigoku Shoujo's OP, Sakasama no Chou (Inversed Butterfly)...

Thanks to whoever uploaded those 2. :)

Finished watching Jigoku Shoujo. Got a feeling a movie for the series will be out soon. Let's wait and see...

UPDATE

Starting to feel sick. Funny throat and sinuses. Been bombarding with med since I woke up, and even tried to take my mind off it by toying around with AMIP, a song-status-changing plugin I've just found (kinda flexible if you know the variables and commands), but it didn't get any better. Seems like I really need to take something hot.

UPDATE UPDATE

Seems like this flu's gonna stay for some while. I was amazed to find that some guy uploaded the whole Jigoku Shoujo series.

If you guys are interested, start from these 3...

Episode 1
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3

Once again, thanks to that kind person for taking his time to upload all of them. :)

4 Kinds Of Lift People That I Wanna Trash The Most

2006-05-23T13:22:00.000+08:00

I know, I know. This topic has been raised by lots of people all around the world, but heck, we can never have enough of this.

Staying all the way up at the 11th floor means that I have to endure with most of them e-Diots that parasitically lurked (or grew or infected or plagued) all over the 10 levels below my penthouse. And I thought having to endure with that 2 e-Diot brothers lurking at my house was already bad enough.

After some time of observation and compilation, here's the list of them e-Diots that I wanna trash all the time.

(1) The Lift Smoker

Yeah, we meet them everywhere. I don't understand why of all places, they like to smoke in the lift. And they ALWAYS FRIGGIN' PREFER to smoke in the lift. Confined place very NICE to smoke, is it? Dammit, these people should just stay at the crematory or the likes of it, where they get to breath all those smoky air all the time. Hey, special flavour in it.

(2) The One-level Passenger

Gosh, these people always makes me wanna trash them. Like the previous one, they can be found anywhere, empty-handed and ENERGETIC YOUNG people. And heck, because of this kind of people we have to waste our precious time stopping at the next 1 level just to let them exit. There's the staircase and taking it is faster goodammit, and they're not even 'CACAT' (disabled)!!!

(3) The Close-button Initiate

Probably you guys wonder what this kind of people do. OK, I'll explain. Eventually, when this kind of people enter, the very 1st button they will press is NOT the button of their level, but the CLOSE button. And that happened JUST RIGHT in front of me. GRAHHHH stupid !!!

(4) The Two-way Traveler

Another annoying kind that plagues the lift with their e-Dioticness. I practically don't understand them - why the HELL they press both the Up and Down buttons when they just want to go to one direction ?! And dammit, after they pathetically successfully stopped the lift, they either (a) enter and wait until the lift finishes the journey right to the top/bottom and change it's direction or (b) just stand outside and give you the "No I'm going opposite" expression. What the HECK ?!

GRAHHHH. There are many other more kinds of e-Diots, and all of them do NOT deserve to take the friggin' lift. They should just shoot themselves UP from a cannon or throw themselves DOWN from the balcony. Dammit.

Internet Downed !!!

2006-05-22T21:48:00.000+08:00

The whole of Cyberjaya cursed Streamyx like crazy for the whole week, because the connection was lousy. It's the most horrible week ever.

But anyway, I think the 'horror' has passed on for now. I hope the good connection stays. Hopefully.

Another YouTube !!!

2006-05-17T23:34:00.000+08:00

Another forward message that I've received recently.

I don't know how the heck this fella dug up such a stupid video. I mean like, it's the FINALS season, and he has time to dig this up from a bunch of junkie videos.

By junkie, I refer to something pointless like this.

Oh yeah BTW, there's the translation here.

Yawn. What a pitiful soul.

I think I better go back to my novel reading. Or maybe I'd go to bed early.

Fatigue Redux

2006-05-12T18:18:00.000+08:00

No blog for almost the past 2 days. I must say I was so (mentally) tired, I had been taken out of commission from the blogging world until now. But well, of course I know I'm not the only one who's tired - been reading a couple of blogs. ;)

Well, let's see what are the couple of reasons why I MIA-ed...

(1) 2 days ago was the Games Application presentation, our whole project team had to burn midnight oil for the completion of the project. Was wiped out immediately after that (though no-wing, who was in my team as well, was so damn excited when it was over - his Kingdom Hearts 2 had been waiting for him under layers of dust). Anyway, all that typing/figuring/balancing crap had costed me mentally, and I just simply couldn't blog.

(2) Was pissed by another bunch of e-Diots. Well, don't like to point out who, but one of them is definitely that crappy barbarian I mentioned earlier on (haha now his rent's gonna increase next month - can't wait to see what happens when my parents 'pay a visit' to him and his fat punk bro).

(3) Add another couple of depressing thoughts from my mind into it, and it makes up another reason for me not to blog.

Anyway, I had to pull myself together a little. Good thing I had something to look for - animes. Whee. I'm no 'Otaku' (and I don't want to be one either), but I'm a great fan towards animes which possess great storylines, and maybe yeah, humor.

[DISCLAIMER : Relax, to all those people out there whom accidently Googled into my blog, NO spoilers here.]

In my current list are :-

= Ouran Kouko Host Club (Ouran High School Host Club) =

Hehe. 'Host', as in something like high-class gigolos, except you cut out the physical body contact part - they are sort of like entertainers. Has a nice setting (high school for rich people), has interesting characters (a bunch of rich schoolkids operating a host club, and throw in a penniless lead character who had to pay up the debt for breaking an expensive vase which belonged to the club - but hey, voiced by Maaya Sakamoto *gasps*).

= 'Suzumiya Haruhi no Yuuutsu' (The Melacholy of Suzumiya Haruhi) =

One of the few animes which practically broke my mind - with the humor, the mind-breaking concepts, and PLENTY of Easter Eggs. Basically it's about Suzumiya Haruhi, a girl who has no interest in stuff other than supernatural stuff. She formed a club based on her 'unique interest'. I heard fans are forming a new religion about it, maybe calling it something like 'Suzumiya-ism'.

= 'Jigoku Shoujo' (Hell Girl) =

No, it's not like that crappy Hellboy. This Hell Girl has way much better storylines. Talks about something like, should someone post a grudge of someone on the Internet on the stroke of midnight, the Jigoku Shoujo will appear and drag the person who was being hated to hell - but, not without a price. Heck, for the past 2 days I've been desperately downloading this, despite my PC's running low on GB's. Need to buy new CDs to burn stuff out now.

Like I said, I'm no 'Otaku' - but I deem myself weird for my tendency to favor the 'seiyuu''s (voice actor/actresses). One of them in my list was Mamiko Noto, famous for portraying girls that have a gentle personality (Hell Girl was one of them - though it was in School Rumble where I noticed her outstanding performance for portraying Yakumo). And maybe because of my weird taste, I went for Jigoku Shoujo - boy, they had different high-profiled seiyuus for different episodes.

And well, next in my list would be Fate/Stay Night - it's amazing that a visual novel game can turn into a world-famous anime - fear the power of franchising. no-wing's gonna lend me Hotori (Ayako Kawasumi !!!), and I'm really, really looking forward to watch it.

Well, at least that was working - at least I'm almost back to myself once again. But of course, getting excited over anime doesn't mean I don't had a life. Went out yesterday with no-wing, Slade and Ping. Great time there in Mines. Hanging out with friends is indeed refreshing.

How about the me today? Well, I had some plans as well - plans that I'm excited about. Ahh, never felt so good for a long time.

Well, stop for now - my plans are waiting for me.

P/S and to Xiang, if you're reading this, Happy B'day !!!

That e-Diotic Housemate & His Bunch Of Punks

2006-05-06T04:04:00.000+08:00

Today I quarrelled with that stupid 'Yeh Man Ren' (barbarian) housemate of mine.

I was on my way out for lunch, when my other housemate PM-ed me and complained about the garbage - again. He wasn't happy about the fact that that e-Diot never cleans up the garbage.

That wasn't the only problem - he brought in friends and stayed for days, DESPITE the room was rented for him ONLY. They used the toilet and kitchen, and practically they messed up the hygiene of those 2 places. Best part is, he didn't want to notify me about his friends' (and actually, one of them is his bro but he didn't tell me about it - WTF ?!) staying over - he is such a RUDE punk that sometimes I had the thought of kicking him out directly from the apartment. Not to mention the previous events of waking me up with their stupid music.

FINE. I decided I will settle with this, ONCE and for ALL.

I walked out from my room, and those punks happened to be eating some bread-like thingy in the kitchen. I packed up the garbage and started to tell that e-Diot something like, "whenever you see flies, please clear garbage" - but he CUT me in before I could finish, BLAMING my other housemates for not clearing up. He kept repeating "Tell them -", "Tell them -" - TELL THEM WHAT F- ?! I was thinking.

In the end, I sweared and yelled and him to STFU. I don't give a damn anymore to his lame 'tai chi' tricks - and I decide that pissing off because he was interrupting me was a good decision.

Then, his bro butted in (I had no idea who this fat punk was during that time, anyway), trying to defend his lil' bro. Oh yeah. I thought in silence - "What friggin' RIGHT has he got to lecture me about things, eh?" I pretended I was listening to him, but in fact, I'm ignoring that fat punk - I was thinking on how to get rid of this fat punk who has been freeloading, making noise and dirtying my house for over a week.

OK. A 3 v 1 (counting in another friend of his who's outside on the living room). I am on the disadvantage because if anything happens, I might get hurt. I decide to shut that fat punk up, take out the garbage, threw it, get my hands cleaned, and walked out of the door. My friends are already waiting.

Then when I exited the lift from the ground floor, I noticed that that e-Diotic housemate of mine is leaving with his other friend, giving me the ugly rude face as his eyes met mine. I turned away from his dog face. Wait a minute, someone's missing. Where's that fat punk? Crap. Must've been staying back at my apartment again. But I had to meet up with my friends, so I decide to leave the issue for later.

So I met up with my friends - and guess what? I found out Yeh Man Ren and his friend was going to KL, despite that his rental was due. I'm so going to screw him up for that. But if I want to screw, I will screw that fat punk 1st.

Upon reaching campus, I phoned my other housemate. Seems like he went out from the apartment. I asked him if he noticed anyone is still in my apartment. He says that though he didn't see anyone, he heard someone cooking in the kitchen. WTF ?! Cooking ALONE in my apartment ?! NO way I am going to let that happen !

That's it, I thought, I'm going back now. I told my friends that I must leave early, and rushed back home. The moment I reached home, I stepped into the kitchen, and stood at the wall. Oh, he finally has the intention to greet me, squeezing a smile with a futile attempt to make me happy and forget what happened just now. Man he was so wrong for thinking that I'd let up because of a stupid smile.

I interrogated with him - I asked who he was, where he's staying, what's he doing here. Oh jolly, he was that barbarian's brother. He claims he's been staying in this country for already, "WOWWOOO", 4 years. He tells me he's temporarily staying here, and he's already here for 4 FRIGGIN' DAYS (poor liar). "WOWWWOOOO". Like I'm going to be impressed with his answers.

I went straight to the point. I told him I wasn't happy that he's freeloading here, and I'm also unhappy about his irresponsible younger brother who didn't tell me anything about this crap. He replied, "I dunno." "I dunno." DUNNO MY FOOT. 4 years here and he doesn't know. Living for MORE than 2 decades and he doesn't know. What kind of parents rear him to become such lousy clump of fat meat who only knows how to say "I DUNNO" ?! I told him straight in the face, I DON'T GIVE A DAMN ABOUT HIS "I-DUNNO"'S.

It ended up like cold war - he thinks he's on the right, I still think this guy needs some trashing. All ended when Mum called. Good. I took the chance to tell her about what's happening. And well, I left the kitchen, and I know that with my parents on the act, those guys are going to pay for their misgivings.

Wait till those punks see what's upcoming for them. I'd be glad to post the outcome, should it all went well.

Generation Gap

2006-05-04T20:55:00.000+08:00

I remembered what F¡яєвџяN said about YouTube - "can find so much rubbish there hahaha!!!"

Well, how true.

Someone dug this video out and forwarded it to me via Y!M. I find it both amusing and interesting.

A very good example of 'generation gap'.

And well, to you guys who didn't understand what's happening - the young lad complained to the old fart about him talking too loud to the phone, which of course made the old fart unhappy - thus leading to a quarrel.

The young one portrays indecisiveness and lack of wisdom - he knows not what his rights are, and he failed to defend it. The old one however, is a hot-headed guy who tends to force things to happen in his way.

The ugly side of society - and that's what makes it colorful.

P/S Sorry if it loads like heck. Maybe it's time I take out that 'Gimme something to shoot' WAV file.

Damn It

2006-05-01T06:57:00.000+08:00

I can't sleep. And it's already sunrise.

Why everyone in this house has to bring their friends back to party ?!

That's it. I'm reaching my max now. I'll have to act. One-on-on discussion sessions about not-to-do's with them.

Ohhh I'm Feeling Good

2006-04-30T04:06:00.000+08:00

For no apparent reason.

I slept at around 11pm just now, and woke at 2am. I sat in front of the PC. I played some games. I returned fire to some kid who tried to act 'smart' in some forums. I boiled some water and made some hot Milo, and I'm enjoying it now. Now I'm blogging. I feel good.

Despite the fact that the Yeh Man Ren (hehe my Middle East housemate) and his friends are making a fuss in his room - I hope the security will come up and bang the door so they'd keep quiet. Despite I'm torn apart by so many things - heck I'm already torn, so I'd just be torn then. Despite I'm still broke (OK I suck at this. I'm still living out of my parents' money. Maybe I need a job again). Despite it's already 4 am in the morning and I'm now unable to sleep. I'm still feeling good.

My 2nd cup of Milo now. Checking out on Waiter Rant but no updates. I wonder how long this good feeling will last. Maybe I'd annoy those bunch of e-Diots who are still making so much noise in that room, but reconsidering that I might end up getting thrown out of the balcony and appear in headlines, I'd need a plan. They need to be taught a lesson anyway, because they kept disrupting my peaceful moments.

Hmmmmm. Maybe the next time I'd need to buy a tin of SPAM and place it right in front of his room. I wonder how they'd react.

*giggles evilish*

A'ight, time to surf some other part of the Net now. And OH, while we're there in SPAM, let's read this.

Pressure Is Everywhere

2006-04-28T04:39:00.000+08:00

I'm sitting here in front of the PC, ten minutes to five in the morning, staring at my monitor, and I didn't turn on the lights since I returned from my paper.

I stared up at the fan above me. My mind is blank. All I know is - I gotta blog something else now. And I don't know what exactly I should write, actually.

My life? Not that bad, yet not that good. The environment around me? Not that good, and yet not that bad. Yet I'm feeling the pressure. Yes, the pressure that's coming from the world around me.

I'm grateful that I'm born in such a wonderful family. One of which is able passed down the Virtues of Life to it's descendants. I'm grateful that Dad was such a determined man, and Mum always cared for the family. Sis Absolut, though she went through a harder way than I did, is doing better and better every year.

Look back at me. I could've used a mirror now if I could - but now I can't, since I broke mine a couple of days ago. I knew Mum was always proud of me - I knew it the way she talks it to her friends. Yet everytime, I feel saddened; I felt very stressed out for every word, every sentence.

What the hell am I doing?

I'm determined to be something I wanted, yet I failed to achieve the right skills I wanted. I wanted to be a Game Designer. I wanted to be a writer. And I wanted to be a composer. Yet I'm still stuck here, staring at the monitor, pressured.

At times, I thought about the balcony next to my room. I always joked to my friends that, if anything happens that's the most convenient way out. And I thought back about the people who really took that convenient way out. Was it really that convenient? No. It just makes things harder to go around, causing more pressure to everyone around.

I remembered having an interesting conversation with my friend's housemate. He said that, it's not motivation that matters, but something else - it's self-entrepreneurship that counts. Well, I thought back about his words. Maybe they were right to some people. Maybe they don't work to some. To me? Heh I'm not too sure myself either. Sometimes I think, maybe I've been thinking too much until I couldn't work properly, creating a block that stops me from growing. That's why sometimes I wished I was a kid again, when I can make more mistakes just to learn more. I want to throw away the ego as an adult - but could I?

And once again, like it or not, I'm stuck on the crossroads once again. This time, between dreams and reality. I can choose both, and I've tried various ways to work it out, but well, not much of a result. Pressure got in the way - and pressure caught me on it.

Well, blogging has been part of my way of expressing myself - at least I still haven't abandon the keyboard to write my thoughts out though. I don't know where this can lead, but perhaps it may lead me somewhere. Maybe a Game Designer. Maybe a writer. Maybe a politician (which I better hope not). Maybe it could lead to the flying ship I always dreamed of, drifting among the clouds and travelling around the world. And well, after reading the Waiter's post, I'd christen that ship as "Kobayashi Maru". It may sound unlucky to some, but hey, I liked it.

Sigh. Now I looked back at my post. Boy I made something out of nothing again - something which I find hard to do most of the time. Gee I really feel better now. And to all the people who read this, I really thank you for your time to read this.

The Return Of The Fire Army

2006-04-27T03:12:00.000+08:00

Heck, they are back.

Couple of months ago, my room was infested with these red ants. I don't know how the heck they got up my 11th floor apartment, but - it's a FRIGGIN' LIVING HELL.

They lurked in the cracks among the floor tiles, they crawled all over the place, and worse, they BITE me everytime they find their way up my skin. My toes were their favorite victims, and I sweared and cursed them whenever I picked them out from my poor toe and smashed/squeezed/impaled/crush them to death. And they like to crawl up my table, which I have to BANG BANG BANG smash them out and tick them off (and I don't know how the HELL they can still walk out of it).

Then, I had enough. After a few weeks, I finally brought a bottle of pesticide from home. It's not the kind of common pesticides you find out there, like Sheildtox or sort - in fact I have no idea where my family got that from, and they said it's freaking POISONOUS (though strangely it smells kinda organic, sniff sniff). Anyway it's contained inside one of those plastic sprinkle bottles, and all I need to do is just to spray that on the ants' favorite routes. And WOW after that, they are officially gone.

And then... few weeks had passed without the bites...

Today, I was sitting on one of my stools, when suddenly I noticed one of those long-time-no-see ants crawling up my leg. I was like, "What the -"

Eventually I went looking around, and to my disappointment - they're back. And this time they were residing at a hole near the corner of my room, just next to the balcony. To make things frustrating, the ants came from the level below, which I assume it's got something to do with those guys below (another bunch of foreign students from the Middle East, whom loved booming up their speakers in full bass). Whaddaheck.

I took out the sprinkle bottle from the storeroom, then sprayed a heavy dose on the nest. Then I searched for their trail inside my apartment, and continued on until there's no sign of them. Couple of minutes later, I see corpses everywhere around the hole.

Dang, why do I have to kill them everytime? Can't they just give me a break and spawn somewhere else? Sigh.

The Unite 2006 Disaster

2006-04-15T22:05:00.000+08:00

Unite 2006 was held yesterday night but I didn't attend it (not feeling like it actually, thanks to the presence of ahemDrMcoughcough). Today I checked my Y!M to find plenty of offline messages which were online rants about Unite, and after reading them I was grateful I didn't pay the blood-coughing RM89 to attend it. Hurrah for my RM3.80 dinner in FCM Mamak !!!

Anyway, here's some links for the Unite rants :-

Cari.com Forums

SRC Cyber Forums

Short Notice

2006-04-14T02:10:00.000+08:00

- Another blog Lampe Berger Help has joined the fight with Anti Lampe Berger to bring those guys down ! I say way to go !

- DANGIT my ear infection strikes back again !!! Last Sunday I thought the cut has already recovered and took down the bandage, but a few days ago I can feel the infection coming back again, then... yesterday morning while I was Sudoku-ing, the cut opened up by itself and pus + blood mixture started to leak out - and I didn't realize it until I felt something wet on me and I looked down... Now I have to cover it up again...

- Friend got into accident - have to help out. Now I realize how DANGEROUS the traffic junction near HSBC was. Pratically some of the lights were out of order, and the street was dark thanks to the malfunctioned streetlights at that area. Cyberjaya PLEASE DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT!!!

-Thanks to that incident I'm now drowsy all over, and can't continue on with my assignment. Feeling sorry towards my teammate, and I promised I will be in charge of the report tomorrow. Dangit too tired now. BED !!!

[EDIT: Oh and nearly forgot... HURRAH TO THE DOWNFALL OF THE HALF-BUILT BRIDGE !!!]

Messed-Up

2006-04-13T00:24:00.000+08:00

Once again, I fell into that messed-up state which I've always been fighting to get out from. Inefficient. Unfocused. Demotivated. And even worse, all of them contributed to guilt.

Efficiency's dangerously low recently, and I've been trying all sorts of ways to drive me to work harder, but with no avail. I've been trying hard NOT to give any excuses to myself, but in the end I can't even explain certain things or events to myself. Who or what I have to blame on? None other than myself being so incompetent.

I remembered the session I had with my own academic advisor last semester (FYI every MMU student has to attend to it - or rather, threatened in order to do it), and well I've explained the problems I was facing in the course, and things that I failed to catch up with - like for example, I'm not quite the type of guy who has the talent to program anything decent, and how my many attempts to understand the fundamentals of programming didn't work out as I expected.

After hearing out what I have to say, she gave me a piece of advice :-

"Don't try to force yourself into doing it - instead, treat it like it's your own choice, your own decision that you've made."

I thought back of those words. Sometimes I don't even know whether I didn't push myself enough, or I've forced myself to excel too much that I've to give up in the end.

I'm taking 4 subjects this semester, and I'm facing problems with 2 of them, and adding to the sad part, I'm actually retaking those 2 this semester because I wasn't doing well the last time I took them. To make things worse, to me those 2 subjects are affecting my other 2 subjects which I loved - and they are games-design-related. Seems like I have to make a very difficult choice between making games and academics.

Blah. Totally messed up. But seems like I'm not the only one who messed up big time...

Friend of mine forwarded this while I was blogging this post. Felt like yelling in the ears of those UN e-Diots (Electronic Age Idiots):-

"WHO ARE YOU TO INTERFERE WITH OUR HISTORICAL CULTURE THAT'S ALREADY BEEN THERE FOR CENTURIES, YOU HORRIBLE SUNOFTHEBEACHES ?! 'JIAK PAU BOH SI DIAM GOYANG KAKI KOMPLEN KAKI BUSUK' NOTHING MUCH TO DO ISIT ?!" F-F-F-F-F-F-F-F-F F F F F BIG GIANT F YOU !!! IF IT WASN'T FOR TRADITIONAL CHINESE, OUR CHINESE CULTURE HAS ALREADY DIED OUT LONG AGO, YOU UNGRATEFUL BUNCH OF HIGH-PAY-LOW-INTELLIGENCE E-DIOTS !!!"

Damn. At least I feel better now. My destructive inspiration always kick in whenever I have something to shoot on. Need to start working on my next assignment now. Will blog to shoot next time.

MLM Blues Again...

2006-04-07T15:01:00.000+08:00

I woke up, moved in front of my PC, and found a forwarded link left by "Chim Yeh". Interesting. *click*

Upon sight, that left me ponder for a few minutes. I remembered when I still in S'pore and before enrolling into MMU, I nearly ate the psychological bait of another MLM company, but fortunately my family managed to make me realize the harsh reality behind the sweet fancy candy-like words. Dad owns a small network marketing company as well (it is running in a much more minor scale nowadays, since he's focusing more on the silkscreen-printing business now), and from all these years of hard work, he wasn't focusing on the profits, but he wanted to help people out with the health and hygiene products he's selling. And he gained more than just profits - it was friendship and respect that really counts into his success.

After some time I've entered into MMU (maybe less than a year or so), I had friends who participated in MLM schemes as well - LB, Goldquest etc. - and they will go around spreading the 'Word of Good' to their friends - and of course, that includes me. As usual, they will arrange some time when I'm free to meet me, trying to estimate my financial situations of the future (buy house buy car go vacation give parent money blahblahblahblah), then they will start introducing their MLM scheme to me, blahblahblahblahblahblahblah. And of course, as I've learned my mistakes earlier in the past, and I turned all their offers down, one by one - along with a message to make my stand that I'm NOT interested in it (my way of telling them not to bother me with that in the future), and sometimes telling them what my Dad has (heheh).

Of course, it's not easy as it seemed for my friends who were in it. I had a friend who nearly got into financial troubles just because he wanted to join Lampe Berger. He took out 1k+ out of his savings, and I think some from his student loan (NO JOKE) to pay up for that RM2350 franchisee level. I still remembered the moment where me and a friend of mine tried to talk him out of this MLM business, but he still insists to go on with it. Then after some time, I heard that he pulled out of it, which pratically mean that his investment (time and money) has all gone to nothing, but at least for now he got away from all the troubles he might have faced now - and to a new life playing Magic: the Gathering. Recently I heard his upline (a friend of ours as well) has withdrawn from the scheme, and she too was relieved that she was out of it.

Well, there's no such thing as quick income - the only thing that counts is hard work. I'm glad my friends finally understood the fangs behind the sweet talking, even though they have to learn it the hard way.

And I've a message to them LB members, especially those guys on top:

You guys have done more harm than good to the people. Your money comes from the hands of those people who struggled with sweat and bitter tears. Remember THAT when you guys meet your downfall.

POPPED

2006-04-05T11:43:00.000+08:00

1 down, 2 more to go...

I was referring to the 3 cysts I have on my right year for years.

Recently one of them was infected, and the inflammation was so serious that my Mum, upon first sight last Saturday, yelled at me for not telling her about that.

Immediately that afternoon, I arranged an appointment in a clinic nearby Cless' home in PJ. Doc's diagnosis was exactly what I found out on the Net - apparently they were sebaceous cysts, and they were the kind of pain-in-the-butt where it's best to be left alone, as currently the most convenient way to remove it is via surgery, and ONLY if it's infected.

Anyway, Doc inscribed a couple of antibiotics, some painkillers and the usual type of skin lotion with the label 'POISON' on top of it's vessel, and he says that I'd need to return in a couple of days (NOTE: Monday, but fortunately I only had class during the afternoon) for SURGERY.

I wasn't SCARED when he said that - in fact I was very glad to hear that. The thought of the removal of that annoying piece of tickling flesh comforts me so much that it easily overwhelm the thought of enduring the pain during surgery.

Anyways, after a couple of days of awful-tasting antibiotics and painkillers which I strangely found it appealing (???), I was back in the clinic Monday morning for the HIGHLIGHT event. So, first he sterilized my ear, then he applied anaesthetics on it merely by PIERCING the syringe into my earcup (OUCH). But hell it was really working, as I didn't realize he had already cut through the infected skin to let that annoying pus + blood fluid mixture out.

Apparently Doc's preparations weren't quite enough - he should've place some cotton bud around my ear to keep the foul fluid from flowing everywhere. Within that instant, some of the fluid went into my earhole, and some trickled downward along my face and then my upper lip - good thing I closed my mouth in time.

Doc compressed the infection slightly to squeeze the remaining pus out, and then he proceeded to cut out the membrane within - and the cyst that was stuck on it. After some click-clicks from the surgery cutter, he picked up the piece of membrane witha tweezer and then showed it to me (and Dad who was beside). Well, it was BLOODY, and Doc used another tweezer to pick out the cyst stuck within. The moment I saw it, I cursed and laughed at it with my silent thoughts : "Dangit, you're tortured me for years, now you're outta my ear MWAHAHA !!!"

Anyway, after some patching up and so, Doc instructed that I'd come back within a couple of days to get a new dressing, and he gave me some extra supplies of the usual awful-tasting antibiotics.

Well, it didn't quite hurt until the anaesthetics started to wear off during my trip back to Cyberjaya - and boy, it hurts for that while. Well strangely I didn't take any painkillers for that, and within that day the pain was gone. But the real 'pain' kicked in later - there's nothing I can eat in Cyberjaya !!! I survived that day with some honeydew and a GIANT mug of watermelon juice.

Anyway, the next day, I returned to the clinic for the redressing,, and I he says that I've to do the next few redressings on my own, so he inscripted a huge bottle of disinfectants for me to clean up the opening. And also it appears that the fluid that went into my earhole earlier started to take it's toll. As it was partly composed of blood, it dried up and a blood clog formed inside my ear - and it seems that some of it formed on my eardrum. So I had some trouble when I started to belch. Anyway after the dressing, I told Doc about my new problem and well, I got some 'eardrops' to clear out the clog.

Anyway I got home, and I can tell you that eardrops are not something to be messed with. The moment those went into my ear, it was so dreadfully painful my eyes started to tear. But it did a great job of clearing out the clogs though.

Sigh, seems like it'll take some time before I can really enjoy my meals now. =(

In Case You're Wondering...

2006-04-02T20:00:00.002+08:00

Hear that sound that played whenever you load up my page ? Don't be surprised - that pun was intentional. Got that sound file from StarCraft. :P [P/S If you want to hear it again, just reload the page...]

Anyway, this week I'm going back to campus unusually late - thanks to something I need to attend to. Will blog about 'it' after I return to Cyberia... :P

Am I like that?

2006-03-22T02:22:00.000+08:00

Your Blogging Type Is the Private Performer

Your blog is your stage - with your visitors your adoring fans.
At least, that's how you write with your witty one liners.
And while you like attention, you value your privacy.
You're likely to have an anonymous blog - or turn off comments.

What's Your Blogging Personality?

You Should Be a Science Fiction Writer

Your ideas are very strange, and people often wonder what planet you're from.
And while you may have some problems being "normal," you'll have no problems writing sci-fi.
Whether it's epic films, important novels, or vivid comics...
Your own little universe could leave an important mark on the world!

What Type of Writer Should You Be?

You Are Internal - Realist - Empowered

You feel your life is controlled internally.
If you want something, you make it happen.
You don't wait around for things to go your way.
You value your independence and don't like others to have control.

You are a realist when it comes to luck.
You don't attribute everything to luck, but you do know some things are random.
You don't beat yourself up when bad things happen to you...
But you do your best to try to make your own luck.

You have a good deal of power, but you also know the pecking order.
You realize that working the system does get you further.
You know who to defer to and who to control.
When it comes to the game of life, you play things flawlessly.

The Three Dimension Luck and Power Test

You Are a Prophet Soul

You are a gentle soul, with good intentions toward everyone.
Selfless and kind, you have great faith in people.
Sometimes this faith can lead to disappoinment in the long run.
No matter what, you deal with everything in a calm and balanced way.

You are a good interpreter, very sensitive, intuitive, caring, and gentle.
Concerned about the world, you are good at predicting people's feelings.
A seeker of wisdom, you are a life long learner looking for purpose and meaning.
You are a great thinker and communicator, but not necessarily a doer.

Souls you are most compatible with: Bright Star Soul and Dreaming Soul

What Kind of Soul Are You?

Your Life Path Number is 5

Your purpose in life is to life freely and collect experiences.

You love life - new adventures, new people, new ideas.
You are very curious, and you crave novelty in all forms.
You tend to make friends easily, and you enjoy the company of all types of people.

In love, you are fun and even a bit intoxicating. But you won't stick around for long.

You are impulsive and spontaneous - which sometimes leads you to do things you regret.
Sometimes you can be overindulgent with food, sex, or drugs.
You have many talents, so many that you are often scattered and unfocused.

What Is Your Life Path Number?

You Are 64% Open Minded

You are a very open minded person, but you're also well grounded.
Tolerant and flexible, you appreciate most lifestyles and viewpoints.
But you also know where you stand firm, and you can draw that line.
You're open to considering every possibility - but in the end, you stand true to yourself.

How Open Minded Are You?

The Keys to Your Heart

You are attracted to those who have a split personality - cold as ice on the outside but hot as fire in the heart.

In love, you feel the most alive when your lover is creative and never lets you feel bored.

You'd like to your lover to think you are stylish and alluring.

You would be forced to break up with someone who was emotional, moody, and difficult to please.

Your ideal relationship is lasting. You want a relationship that looks to the future... one you can grow with.

Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment.

You think of marriage as something precious. You'll treasure marriage and treat it as sacred.

In this moment, you think of love as something you can get or discard anytime. You're feeling self centered.

What Are The Keys To Your Heart?

How You Life Your Life

You seem to be straight forward, but you keep a lot inside.
You're laid back and chill, but sometimes you care too much about what others think.
You tend to have one best friend you hang with, as opposed to many aquaintences.
Some of your past dreams have disappointed you, but you don't let it get you down.

How Do You Live Your Life?

Your Inner Child Is Scared

Like a kid, you tend to shy away from new experiences.
You prefer what's tried and true - novelty is scary!
New foods, new places, and new friends are difficult for you to deal with.
Some say you're predictable, but you enjoy being comfortable.

How Is Your Inner Child?

Arty Kid

Whether you were a drama freak or an emo poet, you definitely were expressive and unique.

You're probably a little less weird these days - but even more talented!

Who Were You In High School?

You Are Sunshine

Soothing and calm
You are often held up by others as the ideal
But too much of you, and they'll get burned

You are best known for: your warmth

Your dominant state: connecting

What Type of Weather Are You?

Your Birthdate: February 7

You are an island. You don't need anyone else to make you happy.
And though you see yourself as a loner, people are drawn to you.
Deep and sensitive, you tend to impress others with your insights.
You also tend to be psychic - so listen to that inner voice!

Your strength: Your self sufficiency

Your weakness: You despise authority

Your power color: Maroon

Your power symbol: Hammer

Your power month: July

What Does Your Birth Date Mean?

Your Luck Quotient: 59%

You have an average luck quotient.
There's been times when you've been extremely lucky... but also times when you've been very unlucky.
You probably know that you can make your own luck in life, if you're open to it.
So listen to your intuition as much as you can. It's right more often than you might expect.

How Lucky Are You?

Maybe.

Inhumanity

2006-03-08T12:43:00.000+08:00

[In memory of the kitten which was killed for no reason]

What makes the downfall of a person? Ill fate? Misfortune? Disasters and such?

Personally, I'd think that it's no more than their lack of common sense.

I've heard about the case of the China High-Heel Kitten-Killer Lady from a friend (though he enjoyed the pictures of the cruel killing very much), and that set me thinking about how these people are becoming sort of a mindless creature (or simpler terms, animal) in order to satisfy themselves, may it be wealth or fame or anything like that.

Then later on, I got the chance to get a glance of the pictures of the killing process thanks to a forwarded message, but I decided not to view the entire set of pictures. That expression shown on the lady while she did her 'thing' had told me enough of it.

Of course, this case spreaded through the Internet like wild fire, and there are lots of Internet users - especially pet lovers - who expressed their anger on this issue. For me, I love animals too, but sometimes I kill them too - and that's because it was an accident, or because I find it necessary to kill (NOTE: This refers to pests). And of course, most of the time I regretted that I have to kill it.

But in the case of the kitten-killing... It's a totally different story. It is KILLING WITHOUT THINKING. Though, it is not like killing a mosquito without thinking much - that's because we kill it due to our reflexes, and adding to the fact that mosquitos are 'threatening' to us humans. But a kitten, it does nothing much, maybe it goes playing around with your stuff, scratches your sofa and dumped in your garden. Maybe it might grow up to annoy you, and give birth to another litter of kittens to annoy you even more. But I don't see a reason why a kitten should be killed in that way.

From the moment that lady killed the kitten, and from the moment the pictures were taken by the photographer for the killing process, the both of them (killer and photographer) had already planted a very, very bad seed in their lives. Personally, I do not hope that they will be prosecuted for commiting this, but from their demerits they will have to face what that may befall them in the future. For now they may have escaped from the clutches of the world, but the crime they have committed will FOREVER haunt them for the rest of their lives. And if they are lucky enough, they will not regret for what they have done - for they have been blinded by their foolishness.

NGIAAAAUUUU !!!

2006-03-05T01:12:00.000+08:00

It was a great Saturday afternoon, and well, took me a while before I got up. Got a phone call from no-wing, says that him and Co. are having lunch at LaTumis.

So minutes later, I was sitting there waiting for my Chinese-style fried rice and iced tea, when an uproar occured at the next table to us.

At first one of the girls there was whining in fear - thanks to Slade who happened to be in the way of my view, I have no idea what she's showing her fear on. Then it occured to me that she was trying to get away from something on the ground - turned out that it was a couple of cats hanging around there !

Well, those 2 fluffies were like the plague to her - it wasn't long before she was standing on her chair. My, I haven't seen someone who's afraid of little creatures that much in my life - not since the time where my elder sis went flying out of the kitchen yelling 'LIZARD!!!' on top of her lungs. But well anyway, anyone who knows the cats of LaTumis well will know that those kitties are filled with guts to ask for food from the customers - I've even seen one who actually stood up to beg for it's lunch.

Combine a brave kitty and a girl who fear cats to the max, and the reaction achieved is EXPLOSIVE. Seconds later, the girl was already at her limits, and as if her chair did not offer enough protection - she climbed to the seat of one of her guy friends next to her. And of course, standing on a seat occupied by a guy requires a lot of balance, and she clinged on to the nearest 'stable' object she could ever grab - that guy's spiky hair. Boy I pity that fellow.

Then one of the waiters of LaTumis came out and tried shooing and chasing the cats away, but they were too stubborn to move away. So as a last resort, he grabbed the cats and brought them to somewhere else, one by one.

So, in the end, case closed, but occasionally one of the cats passed by and that poor girl will be on the chair again...

That made me wonder - is it the cat who's supposed to be afraid of us humans, or the other way round?

I'm Kinda Amazed By Malaysian Technology

2006-03-03T01:19:00.000+08:00

Kancil owner fined for breaking Malaysian speed record with an incredible 956 km/h. Wow, I never knew Kancils can reach that speed without breaking apart into pieces. Perodua must've added some extra hidden rockets at the rear for the ultimate boost of hyper speed, as well as space-shuttle material on the car's body to endure with the speed! Well done Perodua !!!

And once again, I'd like to say - Malaysia Bleh !!!

Smelly Water OK To Drink ???

2006-03-03T01:13:00.000+08:00

Syabas says that "the smelly water is OK for drinking". So does that mean water that is not smelly isn't OK? Sheesh, where's their common sense???

Though I'd like to see all the staff in Syabas drink a cup of it and after wiping their mouths saying, "Smelly Water OK For Drinking !!!"

"Syabas", Syabas.

Hypermarket Security Denies Entry To People Wearing Jackets

2006-02-26T23:24:00.000+08:00

Went to some Hypermarket near my PJ home, in Kelana Jaya (does it ring a bell? Note that there aren't any other Hypermarkets OTHER than THAT one next to the LDP. Anyway, I'll call it XXXXX here, and HINT: It's HUGE) with my family during the afternoon.

I wasn't actually in the mood to go shopping during that time (thanks to the morning badminton session and the packed Sunday schedule), but well, ya know, parents are always in the authority to force their family to do something 'fun'. So well, I was actually sulking (call me kiddo - but I was just too tired at that time) all the way until we reached the Hypermarket entrance, where all the fun begins.

My younger sis happened to be wearing a denim jacket, and the moment she stepped over the automatic gates, Mr. DumbGuard (his face was so 'yong sui' - disgusting till that I even remembered his name - starts with an A and ends with a H) halted her from entering. When asked why, he says that it was his superior's orders to (in Malay) 'deny entry to anyone wearing jackets'.

Oh yeah, WTF. And of course, all of us were pissed with this sudden change of events. Mr. DumbGuard furthur explains that this is to 'curb the problem of shoplifters' (oh yeah WTF, like that's not going to backfire by ruining their business). Dad persuaded that this is unreasonable, but Mr. DumbGuard decides to stick with the 'orders'. Fine. XXXXX Hypermarket is going to lose a business transaction thanks to their 'effective' security.

Before we retreat, I uttered 'Gila betul' while passing by Mr. DumbGuard, but Mr. DumbGuard replies with 'Betulllll'. 'Betulllll' my foot.

Though Dad threatened that we shall all go home immediately, but well, I know my Dad - he's not going to let this matter to get away from him. Seconds later we found ourselves in front of the Customer Service nearby, and after listening to Dad's complaint, one of the receptionists say that my sis' attire was OK, but the security guards were a bit too paranoid about this issue.

Good thing that she decides to help us out, and we were back to the entrance in no time to reason it out with Mr. DumbGuard. He was a bit surprised to see who we've called upon, but he insists that he was 'doing his job'. The receptionist then asked for one of the foremen in the Security division to show up to the scene, and couple of minutes later the issue was resolved, and finally we get to do our shopping.

I have no idea if their management knows about this, but well, if they still let their Security Division to run their hypermarket show like this, I've got a picture here, though not an accurate one :-

Let's assume that 1 out of 100 people wear jackets to XXXXX.

And the security guard chases every single one of them out of the gates.

Point is, not all of them come alone - there are those who came with their families. And from 'Lilo & Stitch' (I can't believe I actually watched that, *&^%$#@!), family means 'no one should be left behind'.

And an average visiting family going out to shop consists of, say, 4 people.

So that's more or less 4 out of 100 -> 1 out of 25 people being denied access into the hypermarket.

If the hypermarket can make a business transaction out of everyone who visited, that means they are gonna lose about 4% of their overall sales.

And that's not all - the customers who are being denied for entry may not return. For maybe, well, a long, long time.

That's gonna hurt a lot.

Well, like I said the above scenario wasn't accurate, but it's really happening in a much smaller scale (maybe), and it's undeniable that this is causing indirect losses to said hypermarket.

Let's just hope that their management realizes the 'good' deed their Security Division has come up with - and fix it ASAP.

My PC's Back !!!

2006-02-19T00:37:00.000+08:00

Got my PC back when I returned to PJ today. That's a good thing.

But my nightmare awaits me. Some of my files (now considered unavailable to be found online) were deleted. I don't know whether to cry or not. =(

Sigh, still have loads to update on my PC. Hopefully it can recover it's 'former glory'. =(

又闷又好像不闷般的感觉

2006-02-14T15:15:00.001+08:00

电脑修了约两个星期了. 幸好还有一个"老牙"的电脑可以用, 但它所拥有的功能非常有限. 没法子啦, 只好等到我的王牌电脑修好为止了. =(

嗯... 今天是情人节, 亦是我一位好朋友"咖啡冰"的生日.虽然这个情人节又是以单身汉的生份度过, 但我并非一个人度过, 因为我会参与"咖啡冰"的生日派对 (很明显的, 钱包又要流血了...).

开学两个星期了. 发生的事情也蛮多的嘛. 荒谬的事情依然不断地发生呢. 虽然如此, 但是也在我们忙碌的生活中增加了不少的乐趣.

所以我的心中, 有一股怪怪的, 又闷又好像不闷般的感觉. 搞得我现在在这里不知道在乱写什么.

算了吧, 我还是准备上课去. 下次再写吧.

Dual Celebrations !!!

2006-02-07T13:14:00.000+08:00

Well, I havn't posted in a while, because I want to write my 100th post on my very own birthday !!! And yesh, today (Feb 7) is my 21st b'day !!! :P

Much has happened recently. Will describe it in point form.

- Sem has started ! And it will be a busy one, thanks to Data Structures and Algorithms, which I'm retaking <_<.

- My PC went 'kong' last week (which Mum was quite happy about <_<), and I'm stuck with an old PC right now in my Cyberia apartment. :(

- M'sian gov't FUBAR as usual, and Naj, Hish, Khir and Sam still on top of my very own 'politician clowns' list.

- The 11 Chinese men who got shaved when they were caught gambling shows how 'great' our multi-racial country is.

- MRR2 bridge was announced to be closed ALL in a sudden. Personally I think it shouldn't be opened in the first place, because the CRACKS should undergo repairs first before the bridge can be deemed usable. Heh, where's the common sense in those guys anyway?

- Speaking of bridges, I applaud on the 'great' ambition of Naj trying to get half-a-bridge built on the Teberau Strait. That's the most unusual thing I've ever heard in ages.

I have more to write, but I'd become a windbag if I continue with it. Better stop here. :P

WOOHOO ~!

2006-02-01T01:16:00.000+08:00

Came back from CNY, just in time to cast my votes in the Weblog Awards for 2005. :P

Anyway, I've spent some time browsing through some of the blogs, so I can make my decision on which blog to vote (actually I wanted to vote Waiter Rant only, but well, it ain't fair to do that, so might as well go for the others). And well, some of them are, erm, not bad. :P

OK, I've done my votings now. Back to my Sudoku.

And he's finally legal !

2006-01-20T00:22:00.000+08:00

21 years ago, this day, someone was borned. And I met him 16 years later as classmates. I saw him fell in love - saw him fell to his knees as he was cheated of his feelings, but he managed to pull away from those failures. I saw him grow to power - and listen to his woes as he tried to sort out the stress he' facing, but without himself knowing, he grew stronger and stronger every moment. And the process repeated and repeated - and officially 21 today, he is one of the most successful people I know in campus.

Say your birthday greetings to Cless, my since-high-school pal. Hopefully, for this year, a nice-looking girl with good qualities (emphasising on moral and attitude) will fall for him. Can't wait to have another "Ah Sou" (Cantonese, means Sister-in-law). ;)

Self-doubt

2006-01-18T03:04:00.000+08:00

Well, recently I'm back to the usual "self-questioning" again. Another semester has passed, and what have I achieved ?

All I can say is : Nothing much, yet there's not none, and I shouldn't be too proud of it.

My parents were always the first to give a negative feedback (which is actually a good thing, but it still depends on how I want to improve myself). First of all, they dislike the MMU-ian style of life - staying up late for the night. Hell, actually I knew that's bad for my health (and I believe that most of us MMU-ians knew that), but considering the community stays up for the night, I always risked the 'lecture' of my parents.

Being concerned by our own parents is still a good thing - but being worried isn't. But well, the dumbest rheotical question I'd ask is 'What can I do about ?! There's nothing I can do !'. Well, I've tried to get myself into the habit of sleeping early, but I find it nearly impossible - that's simply because at late night, I will not be disturbed as much as during the day.

The second to provide negative feedbacks are none other than myself. Basically, I measured myself by my achievements and sometimes, self-esteem. Well, I've always been a Jack-of-all-trades, and I longed to profess in some kind of skill so that I'd have a chance to achieve something. But so far, I'm always holding myself back - excuses, excuses, and more excuses.

I'm a lousy programmer, yet I'm taking an IT course (my parents were aware of my inability too). I knew of a senior who's poor in programming but she managed to graduate - because she's good at doing certain things better than others, and she also took the effort to pass the programming subjects. It's always hard work that counts - and my sly mind always want to find the shortcut, but in vain.

Other than my parents and me, my friends are also reflections of what I am. The power of influence is always there, thanks to peer pressure and the 'human herd' phenomena (or any crap term that they psychologists come out with). From my friends I can sometimes look into myself, but that's just sometimes. Maybe I'm too busy keeping up with the world, I didn't pay attention or something. But nevertheless, the pals that I hang out with are basically the best in 20 years of my life - Cless (nice guy, and still available), Slade (quit smoking will do ya good), no-wing (still rocking our seats with his l33t DDR/O2Jam skills), K3YZ (the most honest drunkard I've ever seen), the Trios (Nkhosm, Augustine and ZyHao - seldom see them not together), Coffee Ping (very experienced in adult material) and many many many more (sorry for those not mentioned... especially from the Net). I've grown to what I am today, is because of you guys. Thanks. :)

Now I'm facing another dilemma - next sem ain't as easy as the last one. Thanks to my failed subjects, I've to retake them - but well, at least I've gone through those tedious moments for once, making it not that difficult for me. But I'd be exhausted to death for the upcoming 14 weeks. Well, the best three (3) words to address myself :-

SERVES ME RIGHT.

Until now I haven't register what I want to take for the upcoming sem (surprise to you all folks who have read until here). Probably I'd do it soon, but definitely not now, as I need to hit the sack.

So, adios amigos.

Looking at the Chinese Calendar...

2006-01-17T02:46:00.000+08:00

Hey. It's the 18th day of the 12th Lunar month.

Familiar...

...

...

...

I remember today is one of the days I should remember, but what ?

...

...

...

...

...

OH !

It's my Lunar birthdate. And yeap - I'm born before the CNY of 1985, which makes me a Rat (instead of an Ox, which most of my friends with the same age of mine are). And I should be, erm, 23 of Chinese age, methinks. Need to get reference and calculations. =_=;;;

Idle, Idle, Then... Active !

2006-01-15T00:17:00.000+08:00

It's been a while since I've scribbled anything in this blog.

For one, it's not because I've no Internet access - just got it this short sem (which has just ended). And I write inconsistently now - maybe because the Internet distracted me?

And bleh, I can't finish my journal for that particular trip which I've promised to write last time. I'm a friggin promise-breaker *grins with guilt*.

And OH, much has happened since I last posted.

(1) I found Internet love possible, though things may turn out a little more than expected. Erm, I didn't mention it was I who's into that, did I?

(2) Some local journalist got 'e-creamed' for mistakenly saying that all Anime are Hentai - apparently, our local Otaku's are rallying for him to get the sack.

(3) I became admin for some online FPS game's forum - not a bad deal, except it's still not active enough. Here's the site.

(4) Me and my bunch of pals went into gaming craze recently - espacially DotA and Shui Hu Fantasy Online. Fortunately I still can get the hang out of those crazes. :P

(5) What else? Oh, I'm at home blogging now, and watching the broken chandelier above me, which I promised to keep it as a secret for my two younger siblings...

Anyway, mosquito's biting my legs now, and I'm wondering whether I should go surfing for a while or not...

My Turret Platform's Anniversary !!! Time To Scrap Rust !!!

2005-12-08T00:07:00.000+08:00

Last year, this day (December 8) was the day I started this blog. Time really flies - last year I was figuring out what the hell is blogging, and next thing I knew, I'm here writing my post in this just-turned-into 1-year-old blog.

Well well, my blog just made a wish - it wishes that I write something less awful, hehe. I better be :P

BTW, soon I will place up my journal of the lastest journey I've been to (which explains my 1 week absence). I hope I can finish it on time. :P

Begone !!! For a week !!!

2005-11-29T03:27:00.000+08:00

Oh yeah, I shall disappear for a week starting 2.50pm, 29 Nov 2005. (which means I'm gonna skip some important things in my life - but I don't really care :P)

So see you guys in a week.

BTW, I can't believe I got this as an result... =.=;;;

Take The Quiz Yourself!

=.=;;;

YES I'M SO HAAAAAAAPPY NOW !!!

2005-11-25T00:52:00.000+08:00

YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES

!!!

I'm sooooooooooooooooooooooooooo HAPPY now !!!

Why ???

Because... I finally got Internet in my place !!! :D

YAY !!!

The Penang Trip

2005-11-05T23:30:00.000+08:00

Oh yeah, 3 days out of the Internet world, all dedicated to Penang. And now I'm writing it down now.

1st day, Nov 3rd

Woke up *damn* early in the morning. 7 am we set off (my family and my uncle's, again - in short, 6 adults and 2 kids) and reached Ipoh by 9, had breakfast at the usual coffeeshop (Dad's customer BTW), and another 3 hours before we caught sight of that *unusually long* bridge in the middle of the sea.

The roads in Penang was always a pain to travellers on wheels. Due to seating arrangements, I was elected as the 'navigator' for Dad the driver. I was given a bunch of year-old maps and I had to figure out where the hell we are and where we might end up with.

The first thing that ran through our minds was the Ji Le Si (Kek Lok Si, but I prefer Mandarin - I'm no Hokkien). But as usual and expected, the bloody jam - cars and people - was in our way. We only managed to get our car parked, went for lunch (laksa, but I'm no big fan of it - took chicken rice instead - and ice kacang + cendol), and left - without any attempt to climb the steps.

As our check-in time to the hotel is around 3pm, we still have around 2 hours to spend. Where to go then? Since the hotel was close to the Botanical Gardens (and Gurney Drive too), hmmm, might as well go and take a stroll... with the monkeys.

"So ?" was my sis' reply, while I thought that monkey-killing was the civic duty of the locals.

My bro and lil' cousin with the Cannonball Fruit... now that's huge...

After the stroll and some nice-but-expensive mashed-peanut-topped ice-cream, we went straight to the hotel to check-in. After dropping our stuff, our next destination was - the northern seaside. Found a sandy spot with nice 'fengshui' (well it is, judging from the Chinese cemetery nearby - backed by the mountain and facing the sea).

Ugly posing with the kids...

Well, after that, we returned to the hotel, and walked all the way to Gurney Drive for dinner. After half an hour, we're disappointed to find that the stalls weren't there (we learnt later that they were relocated). So we ended up walking all the way to the Cantonment junction, and had dinner at a seafood restaurant (lousy + expensive, last time we'd be there). And finally, we turned back and took a peek at Gurney Plaza. Then we walked the 30 minutes back to the hotel, and a movie in the TV then Zzz.

2nd day, Nov 4th

It was decided that the early morning of this fine day *to sleep* will be replaced with the 8am visit to Ji Le Si, along with breakfast nearby the place. We have to wake up HELL early, but it was worth it - the breakfast there was nice (I had Hakka noodles) and there weren't too many people at that hour. Our trip upwards was a breeze. The pond, the compound, then some photos - then straight to the Inclining Lift (ain't free) that brings us to the new(?) statue of Kuan Yin, the Goddess of Mercy. Well, construction wasn't complete there - they're still raising funds to build a Tian Tan (Heaven's Altar) style roof over the statue for more protection - actually to be specific, they're raising funds for the roof tiles.

Oh look it's me again... Zzz...

Zzz... another one...

I think I better stop this self-admiring of mine...*clicks the STOP button*

A round of photos, and we went down, next to the pagoda tower or whatever they call that (ain't free either). Nothing much except a compound filled with flowers, and now come to think about it, I'm starting to regret that I've entered that place for nothing. Damn.

Then it was the time for souvenirs, and finally the trip downwards, which we descended with much difficulty, thanks to the crowd and the stores that made the path narrow. We had lunch at the same place as yesterday (chicken rice again... and again, ice kacang + cendol), then we left for the Ssssssssssss Snake Temple.

I never knew there was more behind the century-old structure - at least until now. The moment I stepped to the rear section of the temple, instantly deja-vu hitted me - I've been here, but not in reality, but in one of my dreams. But who cares if I've deja-vu ? Nobody cares. We had a round of snake-visiting and then, off to the city center.

Georgetown was, to me, a mess - the maps I had were outdated, and most of the roads are one-way streets. We were looking for a particular small lane in Penang Road - in search for the famous Cendol there. It took us around 20 minutes and a couple of rounds of driving before we caught sight of the stall - which was so damn obvious with the crowd gathered around. The car was parked, we squeezed into the crowds, and we went Cendol-crazy with a bowl of it in each of our hands.

After the ice-thrilling treat, our next stop was Khoo Kongsi, or also known as the Clanhouse of the Khoo's. Now converted to a musuem, it only opens for a limited period of time to visitors. Was impressed with the wall carvings that were based on the 24 Filial Acts, and also it was the first time I get to see a REAL Chinese memorial tablet.

After that, we went back to the hotel. I had a nice 2-hour nap (well, gotta admit it's a waste of 2 quality vacation hours), then for tonight, we went to the open-air hawker stalls nearby (they were originally from Gurney Drive, but due to all the upgrading in Gurney Drive they were relocated here - just next to the enourmous Mt. Erskine Chinese cemetery site) for dinner. Food's not as good as expected (with the exception of the "Oh Jian", the oyster omelette), but at least we had our stomachs full. After that, we returned to the hotel, and after 'Puteri Gunung Ledang' we went off to bed.

3rd day, Nov 5th

We decide to leave early in the morning. We checked out, had our breakfast nearby, and we're off to the ferry jetty. And well, my 'Navigator' job ends here as well.

But well, the return trip wasn't directly to KL. We're making stops all around Perak, from Ipoh, then took the old highway to Kg. Tualang, Batu Gajah for lunch, then to Bidor where we retook the PLUS highway again, and re-exited at Tg. Malim because of the highway jam. Reached KL at 8 pm, and after dinner it was already 9 pm. Oh well, how much I missed my PC. :P

One Day Family Trip

2005-11-01T22:25:00.000+08:00

Deepavali. To me it's another *yawn* ordinary day.

Except the fact that it's a national holiday. And also except the fact that Dad's factory was closed for today due to all his workers went back to their respective hometowns, which means my family and my uncle's (also my dad's foreman in the factory) were free for the following week. Seems like family plans are overriding my schedule for this following week.

So it was decided yesterday that both our families will be going for an outing together for today. Originally we were going to Frasier's Hill, but the recent rainy weather made it dangerous due to the risk of landslides. So we went to Dong Zen temple in Jenjarom instead. And since I've been there once, naturally I became the guide.

Start out 8 in the morning, fetched my uncle and his family (along with my aunt - who unfortunately have to work for today) and then, 'dim sum' for breakfast in Damansara Uptown (yum-yum). Then, head off to Puchong, and Dad decides to find out the 'alternative' route to Dengkil. But well, thanks to the development of Putrajaya/Cyberjaya, the old signboards with the arrows pointing for 'Dengkil' were useless now. We ended up somewhere near Cyberia, and waaaaaaaaaay out from the road leading to Dengkil (in case you guys are wondering, we exited from the 'Pulau Meranti' exit near the flyovers).

OK. So we have to make a U-turn at the Equine Park Interchange. And we're on our way. The moment we reached Dengkil, it was my turn to keep my eyes on the road. We drove and drove and drove, not without passing by certain places with 'oh' 's and 'ah' 's from my family (due to familiarity of the place). I went kinda lost in the middle but luckily a signboard saying '8 KM to FGS Dong Zen' corrected my pinpointing and we took an important turn that I've actually forgotten about (blimey, I only went to Dong Zen once - and it was dusk). The next 8 kilometers were a breeze - and when the familiar traffic interchange with the petrol kiosk (without a roof, amazing) went into sight, I told my dad to turn left. We reached our destination within the next minute.

Well, it's been a year since I came, and the renovations which took place last year has been completed. Of course, my mind can't stop some of those memories of last year's Dhamma course to pop-up in my mind - happy ones, and frustrating ones (actually, it was someone else who got frustrated but well, I'll leave that to myself).

Of course, I start off with the formal, uh, how to say, ritual (?) of um, 'greeting' my master and teacher, the Buddha. Then off to check the interiors of the redecorated 'Da Xiong Bao Dian' (had been destroyed by a fire some time ago, but can't remember when), then went off to enjoy the scenary. Man, even the butterflies are tame enough. Mum took two close-up pictures of one feeding nectar on some flowers.

Aye yie yie, I'm a little butterfly ~

Ahoy ! Here I come, with my wings spread !

The picture is nice but the guy... =.=;

Anyway, it was pictures, pictures and pictures, next to the lake, the flowers, the temple entrance etc. After that, time for lunch.

Jenjarom -> Banting bypass -> somewhere near Pandamaran -> ah, Klang city suburbs.

It's been a year (or maybe more?) since I set my foot there. But whoa, the whole place has changed a lot. There used to be a huge garbage dump area there (I can remember crows flying around and occasionally, sea birds) but now, it turned into a low-cost housing estate. Anyways...

Dad drove us into a really really 'ulu' (undeveloped) area, which he claimed that the food was good. We ordered noodles and sort, but well... it's cheap, but it wasn't really nice. Dad even admitted that it didn't met up with what he tasted the last time.

But bleah, that's not only that. As expected from suburbs, we ran into a minefield - thanks to the local stray dogs. We have to rub our shoes on the stones before we head home.

And well, that ends our daytrip. But a longer trip awaits us this Thursday - this time, Penang for around 3 days. Damn, that means I'm out of the cyberworld for that 3 days. *sob sniff*

National Attitude On Traffic

2005-10-28T10:30:00.000+08:00

A long queue of cars waiting for the lights to go green under the flyover's interchange, and drivers squeezing in from the one and only 'U-Turn only' lane just for the 'fast track' . Cars occupying the center of an interchange, inside the yellow box, while the road ahead is facing a congestion. In the Light Rail Transport stations, the boarding passengers rushing in just to prevent the passengers in the cabin from getting out of that sardine can.

Yes, welcome to Malaysia. Feel free to enjoy this kind of 'treatment', 24/7 on or off the road.

People here are so 'competitive', they threw their manners into the Recycle Bin (or better still, Shift-Del), no matter where or when they are. Yes, you can see it everywhere, from the roads to the lifts in shopping complexes here. People here win people by playing the sport named 'squeeze-in first, argue later'.

Chances are slim if you expect the next oncoming car to let that old fat lady take the zebra crossing. I bet my (potato) chips on that driver jamming at his accelerator and 'WHOOSH' , let the lady bite dust. Point is, no one would ever want to stop their cars for nothing here. Well, except for stopping at the wrong lane in front of the reds, and parking at the perfect spot to make a traffic 'dam'. And oh WAIT, they'd stop too to have a better look on that accident occured on the opposite side of the road.

Toll plazas are one of my favorite places too - I can't find a moment where my parents will NOT swear on those 'lost' poeple who drove their cars to the wrong lane, and changing their directions in the last second. And not to mention queue cutters, one itself is already enough to create a chain reaction equivalent of the Hiroshima-Nagasaki combo.

So they called themselves 'city people', eh? I think otherwise. They're indeed city people, but they forgot to bring their brains to the road. Either that or they're sitting on it.

Ah, how about places without cars ? Shopping complexes, transport stations, places where people gather - it's almost all the same. Everytime I travel via LRT, I will have more trouble unboarding than when I board, because in the same time, the crowd will struggle for the 10 short seconds to enter/exit the train cabin. One bad thing leads to another - if you think this is already bad enough, wait till you're reminded that this is the perfect timing for pickpockets to take their chances. Expect the same behaviour in lifts of various areas, as well as some other places that involves the congestion of pedestrians.

If you think this kind of attitude runs in real life only, let me tell you that you're wrong. Check the Internet, and see how most Malaysians behaved on the Net. The forums enough is already an eyesore. Recently I'm into an online FPS (first person shooter, something like CS etc.) that's hosted locally, and naturally, majority of the players in the game are kids all around this country. Their behaviours reflect what their parents 'taught' them - which I have no idea how or what they taught to them. Expect lots of spammings, floodings and pointless stuff if you're unfortunate enough to be in the chats. You might say, not only Malaysians do that but other people around the world do that too; but I'd say, MOST of the Malaysians do that.

Sigh... enough of speaking the 'exciting' stuff in the locals. Let's look at somewhere else for some comparison...

I've been to Singapore, and despite their infamous 'kiasu' culture, their drivers will always stop in front of a zebra crossing. OK, their MRT's and buses might be a mess when the boarding/unboarding comes about, but at least they've a system to tone down the problem. You can say it's because their country's small and easier to be governed, but again I think otherwise - it's the mentality of the people that makes the difference.

Why our neighbours can while my fellow countrymen can't ? This is something that puzzles me everytime I compare my country's people with others. Up to now, my conclusion is that these people lack of the awareness to behave courteously. If this 'social disease' is still left unattended, it's likely our next generation will adopt this 'disease' and call it - Malaysian Culture. Dammit.

Let's hope this is right...

2005-10-19T21:03:00.000+08:00

Your Brain's Pattern

Your mind is an incubator for good ideas, it just takes a while for them to develop.
But when you think of something, watch out!
Your thoughts tend to be huge, and they come on quickly - like an explosion.
You tend to be quiet around others, unless you're inspired by your next big idea.

What Pattern Is Your Brain?

Dedicated to WLR 6737

2005-10-19T20:38:00.000+08:00

Tonight I went to the night market with Mum & Pei, my younger sis. Was waiting at the vegetable stall for my Mum who's making a purchase there, when this car WLR 6737 stopped next to the road.

Well, one of the guys in the pirated CD (PCD) stalls nearby walked near to that car, wandering around to test what's that guy in that car's up to. Then the window of the passenger's seat slide down, and PCD seller went to that open window and talked with that guy inside.

Now why did I write this ? It seems like someone was looking for that PCD seller in that night market. But, and lots of buts, that car belonged to our country's Police force. And unless it's my eyes playing tricks, or maybe it's someone who had the guts to make their car looked like a patrol, I see no reason why I shouldn't believe it's not a patrolling officer.

Best part of it is, later on that car went off, and the stall's still there. Hey. Isn't the police supposed to catch pirated CD sellers ? What's going on here? What happened just now, between the PCD seller and that officer, if I assumed it is really an officer ? I can't say what's happening between them, for I didn't have the eyes to see, nor have I the ears to listen what's going there. What I had is my imagination, and I hope that the imagination of you readers are good enough to picture what's going on.

And adding the taste of irony, just this morning I read about Malaysia being the 32nd Least Corrupted Country in the world or something like that, according to some survey results. Heh, I don't really give a damn about survey results.

Can't blame Time for it's Fault

2005-10-11T18:54:00.000+08:00

The highway wasn't that busy that afternoon, and I kept my car on the express lane. I looked at the clock, illuminated by the late afternoon sun. Will be reaching that place in an hour or two, I pondered.

It's been a while, since I've tasted the fresh air, since the roosters wake me up in the morning, and since, that cold, cruel series of incidents that I couldn't bear to think of. I've never imagined that something bad will happen to my family, yet it has happened - and changed my perspective of how life is. Unpredictable.

How true the phrase is, "Time changes everything". The siblings I've known all these years, have became even more than strangers, all this while we are apart.

We used to be kids that grew up together, running across the paddy fields, catching fighting fish to compete with the other kids. We all worked hard to earn money for our family; our schooling days makes the life of the modern kid's look colorless; and despite our simple lives, we were content of what we have, and it was from that feeling of content that makes us all happy.

But life's not the same now - the more modernized we are, the less the Human heart fills. Greed was what tainted my family, leading into Hatred and Treachery, circulating in a pattern which nothing can stop it. I clenched my fists on the steering, preparing to turn - and to let go my disappointment on the fate that befalled my family.

Exiting the toll plaza, I drove into a two-way single-laned highway. Trees with their falling leaves, clouds of random pattern, wooden shophouses with tarnished zinc rooftops. The marks of Time as It walked by, not without stirring change on everything. I sighed heavily, as I could do nothing but watch the clouds of Life blown by the winds of Destiny.

As I parked my car at the compound in front of my old home, the sun glowed it's red-orange rays onto the wooden structure. I always remembered the sunsets were always beautiful with our smiles on our faces. And right now, in front of my eyes, the sunset still remained there as Time passed by, but our smiles have long faded, replaced by masks that were as cold as ice. And not even the Sun's warmth can melt it.

Time's fault it is, yet I can't blame nor forgive It, for what It has done can't be undone. Silently I walked into the lifeless house, occupied by people what I used to call - family.

La Finale

2005-10-10T22:44:00.000+08:00

"We bring you the latest news update. 2 people were killed in a traffic accident that occured at..." - crack -

Finally, he woke up, the squeaking radio disturbing his long slumber. The pain in his head stung like a needle that drives through him mercilessly. Adding to it, the afternoon sun penetrated through the dirty windows with the badly-torn curtains, through the dusty air - and into his eyes. Took him a minute or two before he could see anything clearly.

He didn't know how long he had slept, all he remembered was he kept drinking until he lost his consciousness. He didn't even remember his dreams, but he felt dried tears on his cheeks.

Who cares now anyway ? He walked to the washroom, and through the broken mirror he saw the once-brilliant young man, a young chap who had hope and a bright future, and now, he looked no different than someone who lived in the slums. Unshaven for days, uncombed hair, and weary eyes.

Aye, he was ruined. Jealousy, from the people who disliked what he has achieved, and set him up to destroy him. Ignorance, of his ex-employer, who used to look up upon his talents, but now resembles nothing more than a fool, easily-deceived and settled matters according to his emotions.

WHY ? WHY ?!

What did he do to deserve this, this kind of TREATMENT?

Not only did he lost his career, but also his car, house, all his money, and the one he treasured the most - his fiancee, who left him even though he pleaded to her desperately.

FRAMED !!!

The whole thing was a set-up ! That night, that TREACHEROUS night, his colleagues held a party celebrating his promotion. Never did he knew it was part of the darkest plot that was going to overthrow him. He didn't suspect the presence of his employer's young beautiful wife that night, thinking that she'd like to join the fun. Neither was he aware that the drink he had has been spiked by unseen hands. The next thing he knew, he awoke on the bed, next to the woman that he wasn't supposed to touch...

Words spread quickly like the fire in the dry bushes. That very same day, he lost his job, his fiancee, and almost all the things he owned - no, most of it had been placed under her name a week ago before THAT happened...

There's nothing left for him now. There's nothing else he can do now. He was RUINED. RUINED. RUINED...

This will be the last day in the shabby apartment he had rented, for now that tiny amount of money he had had been spent. He could have stayed on for maybe a month with that amount, but he decided not to. Instead, he bought something else...

Some alcohol to drink out his sorrows, a roll of adhesive tape, a box of matches, some rope, and a knife. But most of the money went to the package of industry-strength trinitrotoluene - enough to take out a small building.

He started to assemble them, using his limited knowledge of making fireworks - when he was young, he adored fireworks and often made them for the fun of it, and of course, was punished most of the time by his late mother.

He had no father - he only knew his mother used to be in love with a wretch who ran away with his mistress. Despite that, she managed to raise her only son, singlehanded, until he graduated from university. But for that, she paid the toll for it - cancer took her life away, the day he was about to tell her that he got his first job.

WHY ? WHY WAS IT UNFAIR ?!

The moment he snapped back to reality, cheeks wet, he had completed his final masterpiece. A beauty. A beauty that robs others for their beauty. And THAT, will be his final vengeance.

He dried his face and strapped the device onto his body, and covering it up with a jacket. Then, he took the last swig from his bottle, and walked out of that shabby place, with the radio playing some heavy metal music.

An hour later, the radio cracked and the music was interrupted.

"We interrupt to bring you the latest news. About half an hour ago, an explosion caused by a suicide bomber occured in the XX Towers... " - crack - " ... it was believed that this is not an organized attack..." - the radio fell dead.

Silence.

BLEAH On The Break

2005-10-09T22:37:00.000+08:00

Oh, it's always the same everytime I return to PJ.

Mum will nag me about me using the PC too much, and she will start lecturing about the amount of radiation of the PC's monitor is a cancer risk blah blah blah...

Well, I admit I haven't been moving much since I came back. But, heck, everytime I go out it costs me money, and it's not like I'm that rich to go anywhere I like. That's why I stick with my PC (and the Internet) to surf the world for information... and of course, it's kinda unhealthy, but what else can I do ???

And, since I was in high school I've never ever attempt to play any PC games in front of my parents. I played it in cybercafes, I played it when my parents aren't around, I played it alone, just because I don't want my parents to yell at me about wasting time or 'affecting my siblings', as claimed by my parents. Heck, I thought the situation would change when I took on the GD course, but HELL no... Just today I got 'fired on' by my mother because I played in front of her (despite her 'affecting bro's studies' excuse is useless now since his exams are over). Damn. I hate the feeling when I'm forced to do 'good stuff' in front of my parents. DAMMIT !

I imagine my future, where I'll be forced to face the monitor for hours, and my mother will storm the office and pull me away 'from the cancer risk'. Heh. It's kinda annoying when I get 'monitored' by my parents, about what I'm doing etc.

AHHHHHH I don't know. If this situation persists I'm either going to quit my studies or kill myself. Or maybe something worse. BLEAH.

WHOAAAAAAAAAAA YEAH !!!

2005-10-06T18:06:00.000+08:00

FINALLY IT'S COMPLETE !!! FINALLY FINALLY FINALLY !!! WHOAAAAAAAAAAA YEAH !!!

Now, I can start my "Fable : The Lost Chapters" in peace... HEHEHE...