Don't Know Why...

I felt that I am different. Compared to the guy I was a few months ago. Back then I was a coward, and afraid of things. Especially very bad things, like failing in exams and such, or maybe even making someone upset.

But now, I don't know why, now I felt nothing when I'm having problems. I felt... numb. Yeah, numb it is.

I felt this difference some time ago, around 2-3 weeks ago, but I couldn't tell exactly why. I told my friends that I 'killed' my old self. Actually I didn't know it's a good thing to happen or not.

Thinking back to it, maybe I've grown bolder. After certain affairs with someone I'm unhappy with, perhaps. The lesson taught me to differentiate what is true and what is not, and also to defend the truth and overturn the false with the truth. I know this fact long and well enough, but I realized I didn't apply it much into my life, and also I'm doing it otherwise.

But there's one more thing I should improve on. I realize that I am not aware when it comes to complicated systems, or systems that which I fail to get a picture on. I should try changing that pretty soon. Can't afford to let the dead rules beat me on my head though.

Well I'm still glad. Glad that I know what I am, and all the things I 've been through. I should thank my friends and my enemies as well.

Hope for a better me soon. Hopefully.

2 Days of Idiocy...

Day 1...

Had to go make my student payment. Was late for it in fact, so didn't get to register for my courses next sem.

Went there and was shocked. Line was as long and twisty as a dragon's tail. And from someone I asked, I'm suppose to queue on the long line into the inner depth of the Finance Division, and not at the counter outside, because I'm paying by cheque. Fatal mistake.

Queued for 1 hour. Chatted with a senior standing behind me, about how ridiculous the whole finance system is. Senior complained about Finance Division didn't unbar her even though she had a student's loan, just because the loaning side didn't make the payment. And because of that she had to queue. Tough luck.

While queueing over there, I got inspired and felt that 3 pictures best describe the Division. 1st is the symbol $. Obviously you know what I meant. 2nd is a picture of a jet of steam, which means pissing the students off. Last is a snowball. Minor problems will and always will become a catastrophe. And also joked that the word 'efficiency' is a joke here, and also laughed at the idea on the so-called 'advanced online system'.

After 1 hour of standing, finally my turn was up. Guy behind the desk told me I should take the outer counter because I was paying by cheque. No clear instructions were made out there, but I haven't got mad.

Why? Because I'm smiling at the 3 pictures.

Day 2...

Nothing out of the ordinary. Until dinner time.

Went to order a cup of Teh Tuang (which my friend refers to Teh Tarik, a kind of beverage. Alright, it's just tea with milk and sugar, but made in a way so they look foamy). Guy behind the counter nods and says 'Yes' after I placed my order, but he seems more interested in entertaining the pretty lass that came up beside me, and he was very, very fast when he turned to that pretty lass. Standard single-guy behaviour.

Was sure that that guy had his mind drifting in outer space, perhaps in some fantasyland in the West, or more appropriately, charmed by that pretty lass. And he forgot to tell the other guy behind to make the drink. So I called up to the other guy and placed my order again, this time directly to him. Then I waited for the magical disaster to happen.

After the pretty lass left with her order (yeah strange, she got her drink first), the first guy regained his consciousness and asked me what I ordered again. I pointed to the Teh Tuang the second guy was making behind. A split-second of awkwardness (to him, of course).

Well, can't blame. Someone used to said "To err is human".

Long live the idiots.

It Started Raining...

Yeah. Feels so good.

I'm in a friend's room now, using his computer to do my blog assignment. Well my PC broke down a week ago, and currently it's now in the shop for replacement of a new mummyb- oops, motherboard ("...at least two weeks !"). Well speaking of which, it's been a while since I updated this place.

I took off the headphone that's still playing the song "Yan Wei Die" from Fish Leung, and enjoyed the gentle sound of the rain while I focused on my typing in this dim-lighted room. My friend's on his bed sleeping soundly, and he hadn't got a break off the whole morning because he had to rush some stuff for the Anime Week 2005 in our campus.

My stomach's playing tricks again - last night I had a terrible time in the toilet. But thank's to the medication it's now under control, and well, I better try to control the food I consume now.

And yeah, can't help thinking of something funny that occured last night. Some girl told me her 'friend' told her that I (yes, me, Kaizer here) felt jealous because a close friend of mine (male) got too close to another friend (yes, another male) of mine. I can't help laughing the moment she finished her statement. I wonder what her 'friend' was, a psychic? Perhaps it's an imaginary friend LOLOL.

(Hey, to that girl if you are reading this, shame on you. You just messed yourself up. I don't have to say who you are or what's your identity, or what the stuff you did to me and my friends. So stop complaining about me and my friends messing up your life because we complain about you to others, because you basically MESSED YOURSELF UP. Remember that.)

Well, what an insult. But luckily I can take insults, but unfortunately I can't tolerate stubborn and selfish girls who don't admit their wrongs and also their ignorance. Too bad.

I guess it's enough talking about her. Not worth it, and it's messing up my nice inspiration in the rain. Ohhh nice...

Impression of a Malaysian Chinese in KL/PJ

When we say "This guy/gal comes from KL/PJ", I bet most of our friends out there (maybe including you, readers.) will immediately switch to this mindset that:

"This guy/gal sucks in Chinese (or Mandarin to be specific) and doesn't know how to write it. Let's talk to him/her in Cantonese/English/Hokkien, or write to them in English."

Of course, this is exceptional in cases where the KL/PJ guy/gal used to study in Chinese Independent High Schools.

Fact is, I am a PJ boy. And I DO know how to speak in Mandarin & write in Chinese (in fact those who know me well will know that my common language is Mandarin. Sadly, in SPM my Chinese got a sore B3. I expected it'd be higher). The unfortunate drawback, ironically, was that I am WEAK in Cantonese/Hokkien and even my mother dialect Hainanese.

I wasn't aware of the existance of this type of mindset, until some of my friends in MMU whom are not KL/PJ people (They are good in Chinese too) starts to guess where I came from. Despite how many times they tried, they didn't get the right answer, and they were really shocked when they heard about the answer. One of my friends even exclaimed that : "I thought the KL/PJ people are all English-educated and sucked in Mandarin and Chinese words." How queer.

Whee, this means I can disguise myself as someone NOT from KL/PJ area. But there was another even interesting encounter during my 3-month stay in Singapore. (Extra fact here - Singaporeans thinks that Malaysian's Mandarin sounds very weird and melodical. I still can't see how is it so. And they have a habit of calling Malaysians, Johorians in most cases, "Lian Bang Ren", which meant "Federalist". Funny.)

During one of my off-days I was having dinner at McDonald's, and happened to come across a couple playing Scrabble in the outlet (Singaporeans do their stuff there, from studying to anything). Then I struck up a conversation with them (in English, of course), and all the while they thought I was a Singaporean until they asked where I originated from. They were quite shocked to find out that I was a "Federalist", because they didn't expect a "Federalist" will be speaking English to them.

(My friend no-wing thinks that because the Singaporean's English is Singlish level, and Malaysian's English is Mallish level, and both levels are the same. But I didn't tell no-wing that the couple participates in Scrabble contests FREQUENTLY.)

YAY D&D !!!

Not DND... it's D&D for Dungeons & Dragons, the pen-and-paper role-playing game I got involved recently.

Well of course I'm not totally obsessed to the game itself (we meet only once per week), but the main fun here is because me & my friends get to be together playing and cracking jokes (FUN!). We imagined the fantasy in the same way, do whatever what we want in the fantasy, and of course get to play with "gaga" aka "bakemono" aka Monsters ! Yay >..< !!! Also we get to write our own description of our own characters, adding the colours of fun into it ! Check here for the art made by my friend no-wing aka Yokunashi-san, he's really talented ^^

Akiwara Kaede which was my character...

Kyuro which was no-wing's character...

And btw I came across a site where it critisizes D&D as Satanic. It's really bad to say that, because that fellow accuses it Satanic based on only the possibilty of "IF the player gets too obsessed & there happens to be an evil occult passing by in a one-of-a-millionth-chance". It's not good, and the site itself is very, very radical. It also criticizes Buddhism, Islam and even Catholicism. I, as a Buddhist, wasn't quite angry about it because I understand the fact that I can't even stop a living creature from barking at me in real life, but I really wonder what my fellow Islamic & Catholic friends will think about it. And I heard some of our Protestant friends thinks he went overboard too. Hmm...

Oh dear, it's really abnormal for me to talk such sensitive stuff in this blog. I think I will stop writing here before some sniper shoots me in the head, or I might get my account deleted. Peace =P